Hero
„I missed you so much" I whisper against Catarina lips stealing soft kisses from her causing her to let out adorable giggles. "I missed you too, but I gotta tell you something" she separates our lips and I nod my head smiling. "Tell me, love" I say looking at her smiling. "I saw Chad today, he is back to college and he looks different" she bites her lip and I furrow my eyebrows. "Different how?" I ask confused looking at her. "He stopped doing drugs so now he looks cleaner, just like he did when we used to date" she bites her lip and I nod my head slowly. She thinks Chad looks better? She thinks she looks good? And he also stopped doing drugs. Maybe now he is the guy she fell in love with again, maybe she'll want him again and not me. Maybe I was just something permanent to heal her heart, but I am not something that will last forever, unfortunately. It all makes sense tho, he broke her heart, he hurt her and then she ran to the first guy she saw and that was me and then when we fought she ran to the first guy she saw again, and that was Titan. But no, I can't think like that, my Catarina would never do something like that to me, if she is still here with me, kissing me, she has a reason, I hope. Or maybe she still likes him, but she is scared he will hurt her, again so she is trying to forget about him with me.
"Hero what are you thinking about?" she snaps me out of my thoughts and I blink. I really really got lost in them for a long time. "What do you feel about Chad?" I ask hoping she didn't notice the insecurity in my voice and she sighs obviously surprised by my question. "Well I don't know, before he turned to the drugs he was always there for me since ever, he knew me the best, he was a part of my family, he was there for me when I was sad and the most important when my dad died" she nods her head a bit sadly and I try my best not to be shocked. Holy shit, her dad died, she never told me about that, she never told me anything about her. Chad knows everything about her. He was always there for her and I know that when her dad died that was probably so painful and he was there for her, he comforted her the best and I am pretty sure she will appreciate that forever.
"Hero, please talk to me, you are so distant and
quiet, I know you like to be alone with yourself in your thoughts, but I would like to know what you feel." She nods her head and I look up to her. "Why didn't you tell me your dad died?" I ask fast not caring about the consequences and she looks up to me a bit more sad, but also surprised. "I don't know, I am sorry, it's just that it was hard to talk about that" she looks down and I nod my head. "Yeah, but Chad knows everything" I say and she looks up to me. "What is all this about? Are you jealous?" she asks and now we are staring at each other's eyes. "No, I am not jealous, but if you want me to be honest, I am insecure, he was there for you your whole life and now he is back and all perfect, maybe you'll want him more than you want me, maybe you won't want me at all." I run my fingers through my hair trying to keep calm and she immediately puts her small hands on my tensed up jaw. "You don't have to be insecure, Chad is my past, I don't care about him anymore, no matter how much he changed nothing will make me forget nor forgive him for what he did because he hurt me so much, physically and mentally, I still have some wounds." She looks at me with her gorgeous brown eyes full of love, worry, care and passion and my heart immediately melts. "I am sorry" I nod my head before continuing. "I just feel like I am not enough for you, you never tell me anything" I say while she is pleasurably stroking my cheeks. "I know, I am sorry, but I promise, from now on you can know everything you want" she says before putting on her tip toes and giving me the softest, yet the most passionate kiss ever. Damn, this is the woman I fell in love with and she is freaking mine, only mine.
