all the things i cant say out loud.

fucked up.

this will be messy beware. i just need to rant. you fucking hurt me so bad. i was sobbing telling you to stop hurting me and you just fucking sat there. now that you're gone it hurts even more than it did then. the memories haunt me. torturing me while i was awake wasn't enough now you're in my dreams?? just fucking stop. i'm saying that to myself. how fucking stupid can i be?? to still see a future. you have someone else now, you moved on, why can't i? the last time i wrote about you, you read it and thought i was crazy for saying you'll move on easily from me. well, look where we are now. was it all a lie? were you a lie? IS ANY OF THIS FUCKING REAL? i feel like my head is going to explode and thoughts of you will come pouring out. how do i cope with this? it is going to drive me to my grave. someone help.