Maybe Some Day

Chapter 4

When I was eight, I had a muggle friend. Her name was Emily.

My parents only let me play with Emily because her stepfather was a pureblood.

Lucius Malfoy had suspicions that this particular wizard had discovered an elixir that could potentially bring the Dark Lord back to power.

I was supposed to befriend Emily and search her stepfather's office during a playdate.

But when I met her, I was so happy that somebody actually liked me that I disobeyed my parents for the first time in my life.

I lied and told them I couldn't get close to the office without them letting me stay over.

They begrudgingly agreed, and after several playdates, Emily finally invited me to my first sleepover.

Before I left the house that night, my mother stopped me in my room.

She told me I was to wait for everyone to go to sleep, and then I had to find the study.

All I had to do was call for her and my father when I found a way into the office.

I had so much fun that night, making what muggles called homemade pizzas and watching a bright screen they called a TV, that I almost forgot my mission.

Around one in the morning, I was able to make my move. I slipped out of the spare mattress Emily laid out for me, past her sleeping form, and into the darkness of the still house.

I found the nearest window, and used my flashlight to signal my parents.

Their shadows crept into Emily's backyard, and I heard the back door creak open as my father's deep voice rasped Alohamora.

I waved them over to me in the semi darkness, and gestured towards the study door.

Again, my father waved his wand whispering rushingly, and the door whisked open.

The wand belonged to a dead wizard that had been traveling abroad.

One of my father's lowest moments in my young eyes was denying the allegation that he killed the man.

But that was a petty crime compared to what my parents planned for Emily's family behind my back.

My parents entered the small study cautiously, tentatively eyeing the desk.

I stood guard while they searched.

The break in turned out to be fruitless, and the hope that had lit up my father's eyes was diminished.

I was so distracted by my own dissapointment that I didn't notice we had been caught until my father was tackled to the ground.

My mother roared with defiance, and reached for me immediately.

"Grab the girl", she huffed angrily, "bring her to me."

I nodded, and scrambled back to Emily's room.

I found her unconscious form, and I knew in that moment that I couldn't obey my mother.

A part of me knew she would use Emily to get to the elixir, even if it meant killing my only friend.

So, I mustered all of the courage I had, and shook her awake.

I told her she was in danger, and that she had to leave.

She was scared and unsatisfied with my limited explanation, but she complied.

She grabbed a small suitcase and packed some clothing, a teddy bear and a stash of muggle money and valuables.

I helped her out of her low bedroom window and hugged her for the last time.

I will never forget what she did before we said goodbye.

"I love you, Pansy", she said,"I know your parents don't love you like mine love me, but you are so nice and pretty. You deserve my love at least."

Then she pecked my lips quickly, squeezed my hand tight, and was gone.

I'd learn later that she found a police officer and was taken to be raised by her aunt.

I found Emily's mother next. I explained what had happened and where I had sent Emily.

I remember she just looked at me with a vacant expression, and told me to take her to my mother instead.

We quickly made our way back to the office.

Inside, my mother was waiting, standing beside my father. His nose was broken and he had such a wild look in his eyes, that I shrank away from him when he smiled at my presence.

They had overpowered Emily's stepfather, and had him tied to his own desk chair.

Emily's mother whimpered from behind me, and mine reached for her wand.

My friend's mother was on the ground, screaming and jerking wildly.

I wanted to yell, jump to her aid, and beg my mother to stop, but I couldn't.

I was frozen. All I could think was this was my fault.

Emily's parents were going to die at my family's hands because of me.

I watched as they tortured the mother first, until her spouse broke.

He cried and begged for mercy, but my father killed his wife anyways.

He ended up pleading for his death, and my father, grinning wickedly, obliged.

When it was over, I watched my parent's emotionless faces as we returned home.

We left an hour later, to find a new home.

I will never forget what my parents did to that innocent family.

I wake up everyday, and hate myself for what I could've done and didn't.

It's humorous how the only love I ever felt as a child, came from a simple muggle girl.

And I was to find that such love was to repeat itself.