Nightmares

Blood and sweat dripping down his forehead. Where's Thorin?

Where's Kili?

Where's (y/n)?

Running, yelling, dying all around him.

Suddenly hot putrid breath clouds his senses.

Stab stab stab screams blood sweat tears death.

Thunk.

Fili woke with a sharp ragged breath and sat straight up in bed. Silent tears ran down his face as he patted the blankets around him making sure that he really was back in his own bed. His hands then quickly felt the spot where his wound was still healing. The spot was still sore and scabbed over but mostly healed. He still grit his teeth at the memory of the pain.

Fili then realized that he had stopped breathing in his panic. He could see that he was safe in his bed in Erebor but his heart still beat at an alarming rate. His mind went straight to you.

He got out of bed and ran down the hall. His bare feet slapping against the stone ground. He flew around the corner and rapped his knuckles against the hard wood of the door.

You had gotten lost in a book again and heard the knock halfway through a sip of tea. You got up and walked to the door pulling it open just a crack so whoever it was wouldn't see you in just your nightclothes. As soon as you looked through the crack your eyes met a pair of panicked green ones. You quickly pulled the door open and he pulled you quickly into his arms.

His hair smelt like cinnamon and sweat. His body shook in your arms as he burrowed his face into your neck. You could feel a wet spot growing on your shoulder, and pulled Fili over to sit down on your bed.

The two of you had gotten close during the journey to reclaim the mountain. You were surprised when Gandalf had asked you to join the party but you had happily agreed. You had been friends with Bilbo for years and he vouched for your skills with both a bow and arrow as well as pots and spoons. You helped with the cooking along the way and fought alongside the dwarves at every turn.

Fili had noticed you right away. There was something about your {hair texture and color} hair that drove him crazy. The food you made was always incredible and he soon decided that your laugh was probably the most beautiful sound in all of Middle Earth. But he had never told you how he really felt. And you never told him either. And your friendship grew with love creating a strong foundation.

You rubbed little circles into his back and held him close as he cried. You knew right away what had happened and all you could do was be there for him until he was ready to talk. You sat with him until his breaths evened and his tears slowed. His voice came out ragged as he started to speak.

"I'll never forget that sound (y/n). That thunk a sword makes when someone stabs you. It's much louder inside than the sound everyone else hears. And then the pain is so strong that you can't hear anything else." You brought his head to rest on your shoulder and ran your hands through his hair massaging his scalp. "I know Fili. But it's ok now your here it's over." You whispered into his ear. He wrapped his arms around your waist and laid you both down on the bed, his face smashed into the crook of your neck.

"I know." He whispers "but those dreams, they feel so real. There is so much death and blood and pain." He pulls his head up and looks you straight in the eyes. "And I have no idea where you are. It was the most horrifying experience of my life and it always feels so real." 

You sat up and stared off towards the wall. "I know it does," you said, "I have the same ones". Fili sat up and pulled you into his chest. You quickly wrapped your arms around him and he leaned down to kiss the top of your head. "Why don't you come and find me?" Fili asked after a few minutes of silence. "I never want to bother you" you replied into his shirt. Fili pulled back to look into your eyes again. "[Y/n], that would never bother me". Fili took a deep breath and looked down at his hands. "There's something I need to tell you," Fili whispered. He nervously fiddled with his thumbs as he continued to speak. "That first night at Bag End, I saw you standing next to Bilbo and your ears were bright red you were so mad". Fili huffed out a laugh and looked up into your eyes. "I knew at that moment that it was over. You were my One and I would love you forever. You're the most beautiful being I have ever seen and your laugh could brighten up the cloudiest day. When you aren't around and I think of you I smile so much that my face hurts. I love you [y/n]." 

Tears welled up in your eyes and Fili quickly stood. "Wow, uhm, I'm sorry that must have made you so uncomfortable. You have only ever seen me as a friend, I know, and I should probably just leave, I'm sorry" he rambled and moved towards the door. He felt your hand grab his sleeve and turned to see your smiling face, tears streaming down your cheeks. "That's where you're wrong Fili," you said. "That first night at Bag End I was so mad my ears went red. But then I saw a Dwarf with hair like sunflowers walk through the door. His smile changed the reason why my ears were red and I knew at that moment it was over. I love you too Fili Durin you big idiot". You laughed and more tears fell from your eyes. 

Fili's face went from shock to pure joy and he quickly scooped you off the bed into his arms. He pressed his forehead to yours and spun you around. Your feet landed back on the ground and his hands left your sides to wipe the tears from your face. "Man lananubukhs Menu" Fili whispered and softly pressed his lips to yours. You sighed and he took advantage of this, deepening the kiss. You could feel him smile as your hands moved into his hair. When he finally pulled away for air, you stood up on your toes to kiss his nose. 

"I love you too, Amrâlimê" 

Man lananubukhs Menu - I love you 

Amrâlimê - My love