CLICHÈ || Knb《Akashi Seijuro》

the letter

There is no evil that could last a hundred years, nor a body that could endure that.

Spanish proverb 

Akashi-sama

Don't you find it weird to start a letter with the word 'dear'? I wonder who generalized this. Could that person have written a hundred thousand letters to someone dear to his heart? Do you know that I've probably written even more letters to you?

Of course you don't. Because I wrote them all inside my head. Now, finally, I've taken the courage to write down my thoughts with ink on a piece of paper. But you probably won't even read this. It's okay if you don't. I'm writing anyway.

Because I want to. Because I need to. Because I must get it all out.

At least once.

Even the villains deserve to be heard, won't you agree?

None of this started with me. None of us were part of the plan. So maybe I can say that none of the outcomes is our fault. But it wouldn't be true in my case. In your case though, it's the opposite. And I hope you will always remember that.

It all began one fall, three decades ago, when maman had fallen in love with your father, Mr. Akashi. Maman was never normal. I do not know how she became the person she is today, but according to her, this is just how she was born.

I never asked her what she meant by this. Because I was scared to find out she was much worse than I thought her to be. But now that I think about it, maybe I should have. Maybe, if I had realized the kind of person she really was, I would have given up or run away.

But no digressions today. Back to the past.

Maman loved him. Your father. And he loved her too. But not how she wanted him to. Maman was confident. She knew he'd come around. She made sure of that. And it was working. Until, as you may have already assumed, Shiori-san appeared.

It took maman ages to get close to Mr. Akashi, but he fell for Shiori-san just as quickly. Maman took this incident as a slap in the face, and the thing she hated the most was losing. Things got worse when her past methods didn't work on Shiori-san.

I still don't know how she did that, but Shiori-san was the first and only one to defy maman, and she successfully snatched the thing maman wanted the most; Mr. Akashi's love.

Shiori-san was smart and intelligent. It's no wonder your father fell for her. She was confident, wise and, most importantly, didn't get manipulated by maman. Since Shiori-san was from a reputable family, maman couldn't apply her hidden card in her case.

I think she could have if she wanted to. The real reason was, maman was scared of your father's reaction.

By this time, Mr. Akashi had figured out maman's true nature. So she knew, if anything happened to Shiori-san, she'd have to face the consequences alone.

Your parents got married soon after graduation. And so maman married my father, Armando, as a failed attempt to make your father jealous.

Father was a foreign exchange student. And he loved maman a little too much. As you know, maman is very pretty. It's no wonder father fell for her the moment he saw her. Another reason might have been that father was never as smart as Mr. Akashi. So it could have been maman with her overused tactics that made father fall for her.

This is when you become a part of their story.

You and I both.

Maman always stayed in contact with Shiori-san. And the moment she heard the news of Shiori-san getting pregnant, she decided to have a child as well. Seeing maman getting pregnant, everyone thought she had changed, that she had finally settled in and left her past in the past.

But what they didn't know is that people like maman never change.

Since maman couldn't have what she wanted, she decided to destroy it instead. Her weapon? Me. She brought me into this world for only one reason. To destroy the lovely family of the Akashi household. And, as you know, she succeeded pretty quickly.

It was thallium sulfate that killed Shiori-san. And it was me who made her consume it by mixing it with her tea. That day, when you caught me in the kitchen with powdered sugar, I was actually mixing the poison. And even after telling you I won't do it, I mixed the poison again. And again.

I'm sorry I could never keep the promises I've made.

I won't ask for your forgiveness. I don't have the audacity to do that. But believe me when I say I truly regret doing what I did to Shiori-san. If it was possible, I'd happily trade my life to bring her back. But I know it's not.

So I'm doing what I can, and what Shiori-san would have wanted me to do.

I have decided to save you.

P.S: Thank you for saving Ino from me. You won't have to worry about her mental wellbeing as she's gonna remember her time with me as a distant dream. But, of course, she'd appreciate a warm hug after waking up from a nightmare. I'm sorry I couldn't fix that.

P.P.S: Let me dare and ask you, under the possibility that you might be reading this, for a favour. Would you, Akashi-sama, please remember me as the person I could have been instead of the one I have become?