Cause I don't know much about me
I'm still ashamed of who I used to be ~Noah Cyrus==============================
I'm on my nth drink, but the burning liquid is doing nothing but exactly that - burn.
My hair is still in the chic yet simple (not my words) half-up-half-down style with glitter everywhere.
I haven't gone up to my hotel room since I left the stadium, and honestly, I couldn't be bothered. If my previous outfit wasn't so damn uncomfortable, I wouldn't have been in such a rush to tear it off either.
I just feel the compelling urge to just do nothing at all. All I care about at this point is getting flat out drunk.
My mind keeps drifting to the moments leading up to my current state.
I think about my mother, who said she'd never give up on me. The supportive woman who promised me that whatever I did, no matter how bad things got, I could always run back to her. She made sure i knew that I always had a home to go back to if the world threw me out. She'd be the one always helping me up when everyone walked over me.
Well that didn't fucking last long.
My last memory of her floods my view. The image of pure shock on her face and the unmissable hatred lacing through her words will forever be carved into by brain.
A smile tries to form on my face, but it comes out with much more self pity than intended. Pathetic, really. I wrap my hand around the half empty glass infront of me and bring it to my lips.
"Thanks a fucking lot, mother," I say to myself, throughing the remainder of the horrible liquid down my throat.
I call on the bartender for another round. He nears me with an anxious face and slightly shaking hands.
Fucking great, he's a fan. This is absolutely the last thing I need right now.
Don't get me wrong, I absolutely love my fans. On nights like tonight though, I need as much space as possible. It's better for everyone that way. No one wants to be invited to a pity party, anyway.
"He-here uhm.. Miss Yoon," He says with a nervous smile plastered on his face.
One can see he put in way more effort into my drink than probably any other customer he ever served before.
A perk of being famous, I guess.
I take the drink from his hands before he spills it. I nod slightly in his direction, silently dismissing the star-struck man.
He takes a step to the side, seemingly silently debating something in his head. I close my eyes and swallow harshly for what's about to come.
Cue fan rant in three...two...one.
"Uhm.. I know we're like not supposed to do this, but you are literally my favorite Idol. I uhh.. bought all of your albums and attended like uhm 3 concerts. May i by any chance uhm.. get an autograph?" He says falling over his word, starting at me with hopeful eyes.
"This isn't a fan sign," I harshly reply.
He visibility flinches at my hostile tone, and I see all his joy being replaced with sadness, and then embarrassment.
That's a sight I'm painfully used to.
Something along the lines of "sorry" escapes his lips as he quickly scurried away to the other side of the counter.
I inhale and throw my head back, exhaling dramatically.
Double fucking great.
"Hey, Bartender," I yell out, causing him to cautiously trace back to me.
His face went from adoring fanboy to professional in a matter of seconds.
"What can I do you for?" He asks in a sudden formal tone, before noticing my outstretched hand in front of him.
His confused eyes met mine as he takes the signed piece of paper from my hand.
An instant smile takes over his face as he thanks me multiple times for the favor.
I force a small smile of my own onto my face as he walks away again, this time with a spring in his step.
================================
Midnight rolls by, and yet I'm still here. In a hotel bar, in a foreign city with no friends.
I consider crying. Letting out all of this bottled up emotions once and for all.
But that is exactly what the Yoons did, right? Keep everything inside. Keep everything hidden. Most importantly, keep the family name high.
So for the time being, I'll try and drown out my demons. Hopefully they live in my liver.
I rest my elbow on the counter and put my forehead in my hand. I was going to have a killer hangover in the morning. I better ask my manager to reschedule my early morning photoshoot, because I'm atleast 90% sure the photographer won't be going for the 'i drank way too much last night' look.
Just when I'm about to leave for my room, the entire mood of the room changes. Everyone halts their movements to stare at the expensive mahogany doors.
Confused, I redirect my gaze to the same direction. within a split second my mood changed from 'depressed but thriving' to 'i hope hell is nice this time of the year, because I'll be going tonight'.
At the entrance, stands the literal last person i wished to encounter this dreadful night. He looks around the room as if he fucking owns all of everything.
Min Yoongi.
A hotshot rapper in one of the most popular kpop groups. The 'bad boy who isn't really bad' who thinks he is entitled to everything because he has a good voice. Give me a break.
And of course, we hate each other.
It all started a few years back when my debut show was kicked, because their schedule suddenly cleared. I was crushed. So naturally, I did what I always do when I'm upset - I wrote a song. The song got backlash because I mentioned me being better than Mr. I Am Above Everyone.
Long story short, Min Yoongi didn't like what I said. He made a statement of me being a wannabe, and basically flushed my whole career down the drain.
I had to work my ass to to make a name for myself again. I made myself a promise going through all of that. A promise that I won't let anyone believe that they are superior to me in any way.
Min Yoongi struts over to the bar, ignoring everyone's stares. He occupies the chair next to mine, not acknowledging me at all - not that I care.
This is going to be one long ass night.
================================
Thank you so so so so so much for deciding to read my story.❤️
This is my first ever book I decided to write 👀
Please comment on any part that includes a typo, grammatical error or anything that sounds funny😂❤️I'm writing this book because I want to better my English since it is not my first language, so any tips and/or corrections will be deeply appreciated❤️
Please refrain from any negative comments, because I don't vibe with that. 😘
Thank you once again,
~hftb❤️
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SEESAW - A Suga Fanfic
FanfictionWhy do you hate me so much?" My body turns ice cold, and then flaming hot right after. Those words did not just leave his mouth. I turn around to see Min Yoongi staring at me with all intensity. A dry laugh escapes my mouth and I take a few steps t...