The Irony of it All

12

“What are you doing here, Clint? I thought you were on house arrest,” she whispered.

“I am. I just wanted to get out. I love being home with my family, but I’ve never been home for this long in one go ever. I can’t take it anymore.”

“Are you telling me that the legendary Hawkeye can’t handle being around his kids.” She smirked at him and he frowned back. “Your wife has to stay with them 24/7 every time you’re off on hero duty.”

“I know, I know.” He rubbed his face with his hands. “She’s amazing. Absolutely incredible, and I don’t know how she does it. And I’m a jerk.”

“So you’re here on vacation?” He reached over and took her tea without looking at what it was.

“Yeah. I’m on the down low. Just can’t have anyone else realizing I’m here. I can stay with you right?” He took a swig of her tea and grimaced. “That is not coffee. What is that? That’s disgusting! You always drink coffee, why on Earth are you drinking this crap?”

She took her tea back and thought to herself. If he was staying with her, he was more likely to pick up on the small signs of her pregnancy. He was a trained assassin and spy after all, it wouldn’t take much for him to notice that something was off. He’d only been here five minutes and already knew that she’d wasn’t drinking coffee for some reason. Though Clint was pretty dense and he’d missed the majority of Laura’s pregnancies, so maybe she was safe? If she said no, he’d be more suspicious. “You can stay with me. You’re always welcome. How long are you staying anyway?”

“A couple weeks. I’ll basically just hang out with you, spar, but I’ve also gotta do a little recon as a favor I owe an old acquaintance, so you’ll still have plenty of time for yourself.”

    Natasha had been correct. He knew something was definitely up by the second day, but he was too dense to know what. She made coffee for him, but didn’t drink any herself. She had switched from her usual tank tops, tight jeans, and leather jackets, to baggy sweaters and yoga pants, and sometimes in the early mornings, he was pretty sure he could hear the faints sounds of someone throwing up, but he couldn’t be sure. But he knew Natasha well enough that something was going on, if only he could put his finger on it. 

    When he joined her at the gym and they spared, he noticed that she fought differently. He couldn’t figure out how it was different, but it was different. Usually when they sparred, she’d let him think he was going to win, taking the hits every once in a while before ending the fight, but this time, he couldn’t even touch her, and their matches didn’t last as long. 

    There were bags of empty sparkling water cans to be taken to recycle stacking up under the kitchen sink. She was constantly snacking on something, which he contributed to the stress of the Civil War and Steve leaving. When he offered to treat her to sushi, she turned him down and ordered Kentucky Fried Chicken instead. What’s up with that? And she was constantly running off to the bathroom having to pee. 

    The first time he mentioned the constant bathroom breaks, they were walking on the streets of New York and she’d just used a Starbucks bathroom an two hours before, and and a McDonald’s bathroom an hour before that, and this was the girl who could go seven hours comfortably without a restroom before she’d start to get frustrated. 

    So when she turned a corner and walked into an ice cream parlor, he knew why she was going in. “Are you kidding me, Nat? You just went. Why do you…” If looks could kill, Clint would be long dead. The glare she gave him made his blood run cold. He could almost hear the horrifying crack of his neck twisting. He quickly covered with, “You know what, I could go for an ice-cream,” and followed her in. She handed him her small purse, just large enough for her phone and wallet, and disappeared into the women’s room. 

    As Clint was getting his and Natasha’s ice-creams, he felt her phone vibrate through the leather, alerting it’s owner to an incoming text message. He pulled her phone out and checked it, glancing at the Women’s room door first to make sure she wasn’t there. 

F: We’re still on for Saturday morning right? I’ll be flying in Friday evening. 

    Who is “F”? He backed out of her text messages, and put the phone back in her purse at exactly the same angle it was in when he pulled it out. Natasha came out of the bathroom a second later. He paid for the ice creams and they continued their walk.

    “So...How’s Steve?”

    “I wouldn’t know.”

    “You haven’t spoken to him at all?”

    “He didn’t leave me with a contact.”

    He shook his head and smirked. “Oh, come on Nat. I know you. You’ve seen him since Germany. When’s the last time you saw him?”

    She spooned a heap of ice-cream into her mouth, after swallowing it, she answered, “Almost four months ago. I went to Wakanda for a couple of weeks. It’s the only safe place we can meet.”

    “Wakanda? That’s amazing! No outsiders have ever been able to see it.” He mused. “Nobody caught you?”

    “Tony did. He tracked me to Ghana.”

    “You tell him the truth?”

    “I told him I was tracking illegal arms dealers.”

    He quirked an eyebrow in question even though Nat wasn’t looking at him. 

    She seemed to sense his question anyways. “It wasn’t a lie. I was tracking illegal arms dealers. I just didn’t tell him that that was my second reason for going and that it was actually Steve’s mission that I helped out with. 

    “Why don’t you just move to Wakanda to be with him?”

    She knew why, but it was harder to put into words. After a moment, she said, “He’s not actually staying there. He runs around to different safe houses never staying in a country for more than a month. Right now, Ross is suspicious, but he can’t get me so I’m safe for now.”

    “That’s not the real reason is it?”

    “I can do more if I’m not running. Steve can only do so much good because he risks getting caught. I’m not running from 117 countries, I can work in the open, wipe more red off my ledger. I’m helping a couple different organizations right now.” She left out the part that she and Steve had discussed her joining him. They decided that right then was not a good time, that she was more useful helping the people he couldn’t. She was going to join him eventually though. They were planning on meeting up in Wakanda again soon, for good this time. But that changed once she had suspicions about her condition. 

    Having it while on the run from 117 countries would put her, Steve, Sam, Wanda, and it at risk. She really needed to stay on the down-low. If Ross found out about it, he’d make her sign the accords for them, or put it in the raft. She could just imagine how many people would want to get their hands on it if they inherited Erskine’s serum. The U.S government would probably lock her up for experimentation. No. She couldn’t risk that.