Hi, my name is Alexis texas, and my life its kinda crazy. I'm a lost boy from neverland. My mom died when I was 5 and I love my daddy, my superhero. My sister charlie is tik toking and hits me when she's not live. My bf chaf likes to bang other girls Aka charlie. My teacher Mr. Weir slept with a student and now he has oral herpes. Honestly I love my life. I'm not going to live very long tho because my forehead said so. My best friend joe exotic likes to gossip about the girls in school. I'm pretty sure hes gay. Anyway he said that carole baskin fed her newborn baby to her tigers. Pretty wacky right! So my sugar daddy allen (that bald guy from a&w) bought me a new swing, chaf brought his friend shrek, Shrek put his oily body on the swing and broke it. 'I'll bring you a new one tonight' he said. Later that night I heard a knock on my door, It was a shrek. He grabbed me by the neck and dragged me up the stairs, He put me on the bed and suddenly ripped his face off, it was jake paul! He touched my face and said 'get off my swing' but what he didn't know was that this was being live streamed, and the fbi watching. Suddenly Harry styles bursts into the room 'WATERMELON SUGAR HIGH' he roared. Jake paul got up and jumped out the window, Falling into Charlie's arms. 'Lets run away together baby' Jake said. Charlie dropped him and started renegading ' No I love my melanin king'. The next morning I woke up to Harry styles drinking whiskey 'ELLO LUV STREAM FINELINE'. This must be a dream, NO a nightmare. The bae i always dreamed of having is sitting in my room, Drunk.
I went to the store and saw my creepy uncle Buttermilk sara. Once he touched Charlie's Pp. he's called buttermilk sara because once he covered himself in buttermilk pancake mix.
Apparently my mom isn't dead , she just needed a vacation. She came back telling us all the fun drug dealing she did. I asked if she saved me any but she said my best source is Jake Paul's brother Logan,who is now in jail for first degree muder.
Lil huddy came over for family game night, Tonight we played a game mom made called Drugs it was pretty fun aNyWAYYYY. Lil huddy acting very sus I think he was hiding something from charlie. At around 3:00Am I heard A loud piggy noise coming from Charlie's room. Lil huddy tried killing himself with charlies strip pole, He did not succeed so he went down to the kitchen and took the biggest knife and stuck it right in himself. Charlie wakes up and runs down the stairs tripping on the way down and kicking his head, ' BABY NO' she squeals. Charlie gets in her car with the dead body and drives away. I went back to my room trying to process all the excitement that just happened. I fell asleep in the bathroom sink wondering if i would find love as strong as lil huddy and charlie.