I Want To Love You

Chapter Fifteen

Chapter Fifteen

The next six months things didn’t get any better. Sasuke’s isolation was like a ripple in the water, and everyone was affected by it. Sasori spent every day with Deidara, still trying to cheer him up. He grew weary, and things have gotten worse in the last few months. Deidara, who was usually cheerful and loud, remained silent and motionless. Sasori didn’t know how much longer he could handle it. He refrained from sighing and took a seat next to Deidara. He forced himself to hold in there a little longer and formed a sad smile on his face, placing a kiss on Deidara’s cheek. Deidara didn’t respond to it, he didn’t even acknowledge Sasori’s presence. Sasori couldn’t hold back a sigh and sat back on the couch, turning on the t.v. Nothing good was on - and if there was he wasn’t interested in watching it. He didn’t know what to do anymore. Deidara didn’t even go to work anymore, he quit his job - well he unofficially quit, he simply just stopped going. Sasori couldn’t remember the last time he had a real conversation with Deidara, or the last time he smiled. Tonight was like any other night until Deidara finally spoke for the first time in a long time. “It’s been six months, Sasori…” He croaked. Deidara hadn’t shown any emotion in weeks, and yet his facade broke as a few lonely tears rolled down his cheeks.

Sasori searched for the right words to say, but he knew there were no right words to say. He fed him the same lies he did every time Deidara brought up Sasuke. “I’m sure he just needs time… I’m sure he’ll forgive you eventually--” Sasori started but he was cut off by Deidara. “SIX MONTHS. Six god damn months, Sasori. You know as well as I do that he isn’t going to forgive me.” Deidara yelled. “I don’t know what to say, Dei… I’m sorry. I’m trying.” Sasori said sadly. Nothing he said worked, nothing he did was enough. Deidara opened his mouth, as if he was going to spit out more angry accusations, but then closed it. He went back to his silent, emotionless facade. Sasori bit back his tears, but they fell anyway. “Deidara… I don’t think I can do this anymore. I can’t sit here and watch you fall apart. You won’t even let me help you. I know how much he meant to you, and I really am sorry how things turned out… but you have me, too. Don’t I mean anything? All you do is push me away just like Sasuke did to you.” Sasori admitted. He didn’t know what he expected Deidara to say. He half-expected him to yell, and another part expected him to say nothing.

Deidara looked at him, acknowledged his words, but said nothing. He almost wanted Deidara to yell and scream at him, hell, he just wanted him to do something. Sasori shook his head sadly, more tears pouring from his eyes. “I’m sorry, Dei… I just can’t…” He started, but he couldn’t finish the words. It hurt him too much to finish. He stole one last glance at Deidara, whose expression remained unfaltered, and got up and left. As soon as Deidara heard the door close shut, and Sasori’s car pull out of the drive, his facade broke. He laid on the couch, curling into a ball, and sobbed loudly. He felt so broken, so hurt, so alone. He wanted to be happy with Sasori, he wanted him to stay, but part of him just couldn’t.

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Naruto took another swig of the bottle of jack he was holding. He felt the warm liquid burn his throat as it travelled, giving his whole body a warm feeling. Kiba had been taking care of Naruto, just as Sasori took care of Deidara. Kiba was losing hope. Naruto was almost the equivalent of an alcoholic. When he didn’t drink, he just sobbed and sobbed or seemed emotionless. And when he drank, he was a mess of emotions, but mostly he was angry. Normally, Kiba just sat and watched Naruto do whatever he did, and didn’t protest. He did at first - but it didn’t do anything. So he gave up. But today? No. Kiba was fed up. “Naruto you need to stop drinking. What good is it doing you?” Kiba demanded. Naruto ignored him, taking another gulp. Not even alcohol took his mind off Sasuke, but it did help cloud his mind a bit. Sakura gave up on Naruto a long time ago, seeing him so broken was too much for her. It was too much for everyone. The normally cheerful blonde was an angry, broken person now. Sakura moved, and the rest of the group sort of split up. Kiba was the only one who stayed. “Don’t fucking ignore me, Uzumaki.” Kiba said, clenching his teeth.