the one that got away (h.s)

Chapter 34: Long Way Down

Author's note before you begin: listening to Long Way Down while reading this chapter might make you cry (specifically when u get to Olivias POV). So there's that :p... I also hope you guys are enjoying my story so far!!

Harry's POV

It was night time when I had finally gotten out of bed. I still had a massive headache, if anything the tequila shots made it worse.

"Da da dadadada mmm" I repeated that melody to myself as I tried to clean myself up from the mess I created. The sandwich Kendall brought me earlier today still was on the table and I decided to eat something since I hadn't all day.

"Mmmm she lives in day dreams with me." I hummed to myself as I thought about the dream I had. I was surprised I remembered it, but it was hard to forget an emotion the woman in my dream made me feel.

I got my guitar out and started to sing to the melody I just made.

"She's the first one that I see
And I don't know why
I don't know who she is"

I got out my journal that was laying open on my unmade bed.

It was open to the pages I was writing my last song in, which I barely remembered writing. My writing was very sloppy, but luckily I could read it.

"To be so lonely..." I whispered to myself.

Fuck... I need to call Olivia. I got out my phone and it unlocked to my call history and it was full of Olivias name. I was about to call her again but I remembered the time difference, so I decided to text her.

H: liv im sorry please can we talk whenever u are free. call me please i love u..

I started to play To Be So Lonely again on my guitar

"I'm just an arrogant son of a bitch who can't admit when he's sorry"

I laughed a little when I sang that because I knew when Liv heard that she'd enjoy that part the most.

I went back to working on my other song "She" because I liked where my idea was going. Olivia was my She, she was the person I dreamed of and right now I couldn't find her.

Olivias POV

The bed was empty beside me yet again, but I was getting used to that feeling. I almost didn't want Harry to come back because I knew once I saw him I wouldn't want him to leave again. I could feel my eyes were puffy from crying until I fell asleep last night. I got my phone off the night stand beside me and scrolled through 10 missed calls from Harry 3 voicemails and a text message.

Sheesh.

I opened up the first voicemail.

"Oliviaaaa pleeease answer me." I could tell he was drunk, and didn't know the exact time change in Japan but it wasn't long after the call I had with him and I heard Kendall on the phone.

"I am VERRRYY sorry liv!!!! I wish you would pick up the phone. I love you!!" He sounded like a child in that one and he even giggled after saying I love you, but I knew it was the alcohol talking.

I finally made it to the last one.

"I wrote you another song liv. I hope you like it." His voice sounded nasally like he had been crying.

"Don't blame me for fallin'
I was just a little boy
Don't blame the drunk caller
Wasn't ready for it all
You can't blame me, darling
Not even a little bit
I was away
And I'm just an arrogant son of a bitch
Who can't admit when he's sorry
Don't call me baby again
You got your reasons
I know that you're tryna be friends
I know you mean it
But don't call me baby again
It's hard for me to go home
Be so lonely
I just hope you see me
In a little better light
Do you think it's easy
Being of the jealous kind?
'Cause I miss the shape of your lips
Your wit
It's just a trick
And this is it, so I'm sorry"

The voicemail cut him off but it sounded like he wasn't finished. I thought about the last phone call I had with him and I started to feel bad the way I acted. I still wasn't going to talk to him any time soon though.

I read Harry's text where he apologized and asked to call him, but I wasn't ready to talk. I didn't want to completely leave him in the dark so I decided to text him back.

O: we can talk when you get back.

I was tired of playing all these games with boys lately. It felt like I had no control over my heart and I didn't like it. Maybe I needed a break from boys and just focus on myself and what I wanted rather than having my life revolve around love. I was still young and there was so much more in my life that needed to be done than just falling in love.

Harry surprisingly texted me back because it was past midnight in Japan.

H: Liv can I please call you??

I didn't have anything to do today, but I really hated talking to Harry over the phone. When you speak through a phone it's easier to say thing you'll regret because you can't see the person.

O: Fine. But make it quick.

Right after I sent that my phone started ringing and his caller ID popped up with his contact picture. I didn't pick up right away because seeing his genuine smile that showed his dimples made me think of happier times.

"Olivia please let me explain everything." He pleaded through the phone.

"Go ahead." I sighed out of annoyance.

"I understand you're mad at me and what happened yesterday or early today I don't know the time change a crazy but nothing happened between us. I'm sorry I should've told you everything and I don't know why I didn't. I think part of me was just angry about the whole Cal thing. I know you'd never do anything to hurt me Olivia." His voice cracked at the end.

"Harry I get needing a friend and I know you went to Japan alone but you crossed a line. I still don't understand why you did what you did?"

"I don't know Liv. I guess I just wanted you to feel the way I felt..."

"Well it worked Harry? Are you happy?" I was angry for some reason. I wasn't sure why because I figured I would have have been crying by now.

"No I'm not."

"I'm tired of feeling like my heart is being played with nonstop. I don't want to be like this every time you leave Harry, it's not healthy for you or me. You crossed a fine line and it feels like I don't even know who you are anymore. You've only been gone for a few days too?? We can talk more when you get home, but if this is how it's gonna be every time you leave I don't want it." I said and hung up the phone. That's when the tears started to fall and it felt like there was a rain cloud hovering over my head.

For the rest of my day off I laid in bed and cried over Harry Styles because deep down I knew our lives would never match up.