NOVEMBERLAND: the little shieldmaiden

23

The crowd created a huge opening in the middle of the room. I knew what it meant, the song gave me chills and it was if I was there again. As if I was just told that Father was dead. It felt as if everyone was watching me, and when I stepped into the circle I saw my siblings too. We were going to dance, a dance in our father's name. The music was Norse, with rhythmic drums that gave a somewhat feeling of power. But for me, it made me at my weakest. We joined our hands in a circle. I held Grim's and Storm's, which I had done for the past years. We began walking in one direction as we kneeled down to one side and then the other following the rhythm. 

Then we joined together in the middle, having one hand on our back and the other lined up with our siblings. It was so odd doing this when we all clearly knew what was going on, but I somewhat forgot it in a few seconds. I had to fight back the tears, if I were to be alone my eyes would stream. We were all distancing ourselves, and doing the dance as if it was a duty. After a while, I finally looked up, and I searched for Tyr. He was always there when I had done this, helping me through it. I found Viorica, but I kept on looking. I needed Tyr, no one else. Then I found him, I wanted to run towards him and fall in his embrace but I could not. His eyes gave me the same look as always, saying "You can do this". 

I lifted my head up, I needed to look strong. So much was about to happen, and one slip could ruin it all. I felt some eyes staring at me, and I looked at them carefully without being obvious. It was Alva, her eyes looked empty but also frightened. She was scared, and to be fair so was I. 

The last drum beat hit and it made me snap out of my thinking. We separated ourselves from each other, and we greeted the applause of the people. I kept holding my head up high as I slightly smiled to show my gratitude. I could feel my eyes tearing up, but I blinked a little to try and keep it away. Then as the applause stopped the chatting and music started again. It felt as weird as always, getting back to reality after that dance. 

People complimented me as I searched to find Viorica, I could not go to Tyr as I usually did, he had his mission. As I looked around someone grabbed my arm and when I saw who it was the feeling of sadness grew. "It was a lovely dance daughter, you put on a great show. But not well enough," Mother said in a spiteful voice as she looked another way. As she had spat enough I found Viorica. She saw me too, and her eyes had grown a look of despair. 

"I have no idea of what you are talking about Mother," I said as I waited for her to let go of my hand.

"Oh, I know what you and your Grandfather is doing," she said as she looked up at me. 

I looked down at her, and I could see her eyes piercing at me. "I have no idea of what you are talking about, now let go of my hand. You would not want the nobles to see this," I said as I tilted my head up to make her feel smaller. 

She then pressed my hand a little harder to make me flinch, but I did not. As she did not get the reaction she wanted she let go of my hand and stormed away. I walked calmly towards Viorica, and she did not like what she had just seen. I assured her that I was alright, but she was not having it. Even though Mother was older than Viorica, she still behaved as if she was younger. 

"Have you seen Tyr?" I asked so that we could talk about something else. 

"I think he went to fulfill his duty, but I can't see as far as you might," she said as she referred to our height difference.  I never thought about our height difference, she always made herself feel so tall, but she was rather small. I searched the room, they were nowhere to be seen.

"I can't see them," I said and looked down again at the Escan Queen. 

"Well, let's just hope he's doing what he's been told," she said and sipped her drink.