bob sagets diary: wrotten in first page 1981.... hello diary, im finally talking to you, i was meant to write to you the other day but i was a bit.... well.... busy and this is where it all began, i was in my kitchen making myself a large and very hard to cook dinner ( a large potnoodle!). when i suddenly heard a loud bang!!!, i tiptoed in to the hall and was petrified! The door was open, and it had im upstairs come up and visit me i just want to kill you(in blood) , p.s. from daisy! i was petrified but wanted to see who it was, if it was from my friends tricking me and it was really just ketchup and not blood, so i tiptoed upstairs and looked in my bathroom, there was nothing! So i took a look in my bedroom and something was making a noise it sounded like a wait... a ... a cow? i opened my wardrobe and yes, there was a giant cow in there looking funnily at me. I thought it was a pretty sick joke for someone put cows in my house! but laughed a bit, when i herd something else, all of the lads comeing out from under the bed saying congratz as it was my stag night, i was marrying this lovely girl she was beautiful she had short brown hair, was well built and was my type of height for girls, she was a dwarf but it didnt bother me because i was not that tall either i think she was 2foot and i was 7ft but it still didnt bother me, she said she was the luckiest elf in the workshop because she had a young husband like me, ohh yes i forgot to tell you im 24 shes 69, but didnt look a age over..90!
next day...: hello i have came from the dead, its me THE EVIL DWARF!!!
