Night and Day

7 - As Water Meets the Sand

A night in June of last year, Vince saw himself in front of a familiar apartment. From the window, the lights were bright, and the television was on. He was not sure that it was the right decision, but still he found himself back to his place again. He sat on the bench outside as he asked for courage. By his feet, he saw an extra pair of shoes that he does not recognize. It might be too late, he heard himself, But I want to be sure.

He knocked quietly at the door. Gio appeared shortly, he could tell that he was smiling before he saw him at his doorsteps.

"Gio? Can we talk?"

Vince saw him look back at his bedroom door. May kasama siya, he assumed. Gio looked at him without saying anything.

"Please?" he whispered.

The young man sneered at him in disbelief or disgust, both he understood, were equally appropriate.

"Vince, ba't ka nandito?"

There was that tone of betrayal he was expecting, a character in his voice which also resonated sadness and surrender. He pushed forward. He knows he had nothing to lose but his last chance.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't be here, pero-" he was holding back the tears already.

"I can't-"

"But I can be better, right? I'll be better," he felt his voice cracked in finding the right words to say.

"Pag-isipan mo muna, please?" he added.

Vince was not surprised to hear his voice soften continuously as he begs for his one chance. Gio looked behind his back again before trying to reply, but still there were no words.

"I'm not okay."

There was a brief silence after.

"Anong gusto mong gawin ko, Vince?"

"Please help me."

He did not know how to continue. He felt like he was just as clueless as the man in front of him. He was slowly starting to cry. Kailangan pa din kita Gio, he desperately thought, unable to hear it from his own mouth, as he felt he completely lost every right.

"At least, p-p'wede ko ba s'ya makilala?"

"No, Vince- "

He grabbed his hand.

"If he's good enough for you, I can love him as well. Tayong tatlo. We can be together, right?"

Gio pushed him aside in shock, away from the door. The past lover is already crying.

"Vince, 'wag na natin gawin 'to, please?"

He knew he just said the same mistake which ended them a few months ago. He felt the past lover's humiliation, and it was not personal, but all along, for him. He slowly approached Gio and locked him in a hug. There was no more to say.

In his car, on the present day, Vince stares at the packed parking lot, as he lets his tears fall freely. He hears no music inside the car but just the noise passing by. The clock on his phone by the dashboard glows to tell him it is already 8:00 PM. He immediately dries his eyes and takes the small box beside him as he goes out to the prying world.

⸙

It was already an hour since Gio went out of the apartment. Tom crawled to an earshot behind the window when the man named Vince came knocking earlier. The exchange of words with Gio remained on his mind, not even the music on the television could drown the mix of thoughts he was having. He felt fearful and curious at the same time.