Getting over it

disbelief

It was dark and cold. Like a void that you are constantly falling in. It wasnt black, more of a sharp and distant nothingness. A Nothingness that swallowed her. She was in so much pain engulfed her body. She felt like the prime example of torture. She felt her eyes fog up as they were drowned with tears foring and falling. Hot steamy tears that turned her eyes and cheeks red. Her nose was so clogged up, and she made an attempt to speak. An attempt to call for help. Anyone, anyone she would be thankful for. She attempted a scream but she choked and gagged on her own words. She couldnt breath. When this hit her, she started to panic and cry harder. She wanted this to end, she wanted anything to make this misery end. She finally gasped for air as she woke up. Her body was still in so much pain as she put a hand to her cheek. It was damp. She had really been crying. She then bursted out into tears. 'why am i crying..?' she thought. Then it all pieced together. Her name was hiyoko saonji, and her only friend, mahiru, was dead. She finally opened her heart, just to have that girl ripped away from her. Her sobs became harder as she felt a sharp pain in her chest everytime she tried to take a deep breath "M-M-M..MAHIRU! P-P-PLEASE! N-NO..!" She was in utter disbelief. She couldnt believe mahiru was dead. She didnt want to believe it. No matter how many times she told herself it was true, she still couldnt believe it. She was gone, and she couldnt do anything about it "N-NO! I-I-I'M SORRY! P-PLEASE NO! I-I-I-" She cut herself off, muffled by loud sobbing and painful breaths "W-WHY?! W-W-WHY WASNT I-IT ME..?!" she then remembered why it wasnt her. That peko girl. She did this. Over some fucking game. Over some false game. She clenched her fists as her sad sobs turned into angry sobs. She attempted to stand up but her legs felt weak. She stumbled to the floor. She hid her face and continued to sob. She was the only person hiyoko trusted, and now she was gone. Her sobs died down, as she still couldnt believe it. She was really gone, and hiyoko couldnt do anything about it. She could only sob and whine. Why....why...?