PROLOGUE.

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This story is posted on Asianfanfics with same title. Enjoy ^^ 


Donghae couldn't possibly have seen it coming. He is positive his house is free of any hazard. Sure he isn't the most cleanest in the group but decent enough to live in a space without much dirty laundry or any mold spreading here and there in his apartment.

So it isn't much of a surprise if he's so relaxed in his own house not to think of anything dangerous from happening, right? In case of fire, he rarely cooks because he's too busy in the studio or the gym or anywhere Super Junior having a schedule. When he's coming home from all of it, he absentmindedly walking around not paying much attention even if there's a nail over the floor ready to prick his flesh open. Yet so far nothing is happened. So it's fine.

Oh boy how wrong is he.

Donghae is so tired from all the interviews and dance practices they're having. He could care less if he stumbles on his bed without a shower. But his body is filled with horrible stench of sweat, the sticky liquid clasped his body like second skin layer and there's no way he will sleep like that.

He drops his watch and any over the top accessories—unlike Yesung's hyung though the man is wearing too much, put his phone by the desk and grabs his towel. Sleep is too strong knocking over his tired lids that he remains them close while walking to the washroom. That's when his feet slipped from something on the ground. Shocked and taken off guard, instinctively he closes his eyes unable to see what is actually he's stepping into. Something sharp hits the back of his head and Donghae is lying motionless on the ground.

When he opens his lids back, his gaze is in blur. Breath slowly turns rag as his chest heaving up and down in an attempt to calm himself down. He is sure the thing hitting his head is extremely hard because his head isn't just pounding but it feels numb. Yet so painful at the same time. Warm liquid soaking his collar wet and he knows what it is. He tries to move but even a slight lift of his neck intensifies the pain on his head. Donghae stops moving, knowing instantly if he doesn't make a move he will die of blood loss.

The cons of living alone is exactly this moment. There's no one to help him. He's by himself and he has to get up to get his phone inside his room but the way suddenly seems too far. Donghae's head starts to spin and his eyes become more blurry. Limbs feel cold because of the bathroom's tile but he knows that's not the reason.

"H—Help." Who is he kidding? There's no one around. It's not like anyone would come barging inside his house all of a sudden and able to help him. Everyone is tired; the rest of his members who's living in the same apartment complex as him won't come to his house too. It's almost midnight and for sure they are all getting ready to sleep too.

His mind drifts to them; Hyukjae, Heechul and Leeteuk who's living in the same complex like him. But he can't possibly reach them for help now. Even moving feels like a heavy task to his body, he doesn't know why. Does he hit his head too hard? Donghae's whole arms are numb now.

He tries to make a crawl slowly to the door, only reaching halfway when his head couldn't tolerate the pain any longer. Groaning out helplessly tears spring out from his eyes. He can't do this alone. This is the end. He sees his whole life flashing through his memory box; his family, his fans, his members, Hyukjae.

I'm dying.

And it's cold.




"Lee Donghae."

There's a voice calling his name. It sounds so soft, so melodic, like an elderly woman yet there is a light vibrant in her tone.


"Lee Donghae."


The voice becomes louder although the echo hasn't died down yet. Somebody is calling for him but he can't see her. Everything is dark, and cold and silence.


Where the hell am I?


Still here. The voice is answering him? So she's here? Wait—where is here again?

What's going on? He is confused. Donghae tries to think back the last place he has been before coming into this darkness. But the harder he thinks, the more he seems to forget. It's frustrating. He's scared. He doesn't like to be alone.

S—Save me.


"Lee Donghae." She calls for him again. "Ashes or Living?"




"Lee Donghae, ashes or living?"






"Ashes or Living....?"





"Living! LIVING!" He doesn't know why but he's screaming at the top of his lungs, the burn of those two organs make him shudder in the dark. He hears his own breath ragging—this feels like dejavu and then something bright flashes over his eyes.

He's back in his bathroom, the same white ceiling and walls and tiles. Donghae furrows his eyebrows in deep confusion. Trying to recap on the last hours before. Realization dawned on him and his whole body becomes tense. But he notices none of his limbs are numb now, even the pain at the back of his head has subsided. He tries to sit up without much effort. Like he is completely fine.

His eyes stare at the bathtub right in front of his eyes as he sits there dumbfounded. Am I dreaming? He takes a stand, no wobbling nor headache. But the dull sensation behind his head remained. He wonders what it is.

As Donghae turns around to walk towards the sink, his eyes widen in shock. The thoughts of him dreaming the fall last night vanishes in an instant. For there at the edge of the sink is a trace of red dark blood tainting the white porcelain object. His eyes follow the trails down the floor horrifyingly. There it is, a pool of same dark blood just above the place where's his head is lying seconds ago near the door. There is also some puddle at the center of the bathroom.

Both his hand cupping his mouth in fear. He almost stumble again to the floor if it isn't because of his hand reaching the walls faster. Sliding down his tears spring out of his eyes. He sobs loudly, knowing whatever voices in his dream just now is real—same goes with the words it left to him before he wakes up.


Live your life to the fullest today. At the end of it, come back to me.




He only has one whole day and he can't waste it.



a/n: Hello fellow ELF in Wattpad huhuhu :D

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