The state that I'm in. (BEING EDITED)

Revelations

Rose had let him in and I could hear them chatting at the kitchen table having tea when I walked in and he immediately stood up to greet me with a chaste kiss and a hug. He looked amazing with his black jeans torn at the knees and a grey t-shirt that revealed some of his enigmatic tattoos that looked unbelievably sexy on him. I missed him so much. How can you miss someone so much when you have known them so little.

‘Hey. How did you do?’ he asked me concerned.

‘You don’t need to ask her, she did well" Rose said  ‘unlike us she doesn’t need to study much’ she complained.

‘It’s not my fault I’m smart’ I joked before I sat right next to him and he smiled at me.

‘You are here early,’ I noted.

‘I finished work at three, had a shower, picked my bag and left. I even went to Pete’s apartment and left my stuff there before I headed here.’ He explained.

‘You are fast!’ Rose exclaimed. ‘Anyway, guys I’m going to take a nap. We are coming at the club tonight. Harry you are welcome to come with me as she is working tonight’ she added.

‘OK. I might just do that. If Pete doesn’t want to come along I will take you up on your offer and bore you all night’ he smiled at her.

Rose tactfully left us alone and I showed Harry to the living room where we sat on the big black comfy sofa to rest.

He leaned back and took my hand in his and I could feel my breathing changing now that we were alone; those green eyes staring at me penetrated me and invaded all my thoughts.

‘Did you miss me?’ he asked me playfully with a grin.

‘Very" I replied blushing.

‘I missed you, too’ he confessed.

‘So what do you want to do now?’ he asked me only to be interrupted by a the ringing sound of his mobile phone.

‘Excuse me, I have to take this’ he said sliding his thumb on the screen his expression changed and stiff. He stood up and distanced himself from me and I could hear a deep male voice on the other end but I couldn’t make out what he was saying.

He used his other hand to push his long hair away from his face and looked worried and confused.

‘No, not yet. No, I will. I can’t talk right now.’ He said and I felt a huge weight on my chest.

What did he mean ‘not yet’. Had they asked him if he had slept with me? I’ve seen how easily girls threw themselves at him. Did he expect that I would do the same at such a short time? I was going out of my mind with assumptions as I looked at him talking not facing me. When he eventually turned I froze with the empty look in his eyes. Why would someone call him and ask him something like that? Who was on the other end of the line? Why was Harry in such a bad mood all of a sudden, his old frown back on?

‘I said OK. I will,’ he hung up and looked at me guiltily.

‘Is something wrong?’ I asked trying not to reveal how I felt but the tremble in my voice gave me away.

His expression was beyond worried; it was desperate, confused and troubled. He sat next to me and said:

‘You know I like you right?’ I nodded.

‘I have to tell you something and when I do you will probably not want to talk to me ever again but I need to do this before we move on… if you want me to leave right after I tell you, I understand and I will.’

‘Who was on the phone?’ I almost shout. ‘What is this about, you are scaring me’ I said fear in my voice. I didn’t know what to think and I just couldn’t figure him out. I was now standing and my hands were hugging my stomach as a defense mechanism I guess, and I looked at him demanding answers. What was this thing that he kept postponing telling me and why would I ask him to leave once I heard?