Black Dahlia

But reality is that, where life could never be provisioned
But if I could wish for one thing, I'd go back and I'd fix it
I'd tackle all your obstacles and kill them with precision
And better the intentions of every single person
Who play a part in you learning exactly what your worth is

-Angel Haze

I'm watching myself in the wall mirror backstage nervously, looking for error, looking for flaws, but I can't see any. I'm practicing my speech, but I can't find the words I want to say without my throat getting stuffed with suppressed tears. It's weird... because I've waited about 4 years for this, and now I feel so unprepared and vulnerable.

"You ready to go up there?" My boyfriend wrapped his arms around me and planted a soft kiss on my neck before sniffing my scent. "What's wrong? You look beautiful."

"I'm fine," I fake a smile. "And thanks."
"You're welcome. And Rai's here." I smiled at that. I want seeing this to be in her memories, and I want her to think something of me. I want to be the perfect role model for her.

I smiled until I heard the applause from the last speech come to an end. Then my stomach began to overflow in nervousness. My stomach twists in a burning sensation. "We also have a commencement speech from Rayne DeGrandpé on the behalf of Mynce Mendoza."

I don't know why they're having me give a whole speech about one dead person in front of the whole school and their friends and family. I guess you can learn something from her.

"You got this," he whispered in my ear and left through the door to go back to join the audience.

I walked through the curtains out into the screaming lights of the stage. There's applause and cheering everywhere, and these people don't even know me. There's nothing but love and understanding from those that have been through losing someone. I guess I'm not so nervous anymore.

I cleared my throat as I walked to the podium to avoid clearing it in the microphone. I adjusted the microphone to my fitting before quickly scoping the area.

"Mining is the hardest part of finding gold. And when you do get to the gold, it's all dirty and covered in dirt before you clean it off. Dirty gold. That's Mynce. Dirty Gold is Mynce. She got through her tough times of mining and found gold in the paradise of Heaven."

I looked at the teacher's whispering to each other. I know they're talking about my speech, but I don't care. I'm going to make them feel the power behind my words. They're going to understand and feel me within this speech. They're going to feel the hurt, heartbreak, confusion, loneliness and depression that I once did. They never understood, and today, I will make them. My words will dive into their conscience, and play over and over like a scratched vinyl. The mic is the record, and the needle's my words.

"Mynce would've graduated last year. In fact, she'd be among you guys in the audience next to Larry rubbing her baby bump, watching me graduate. I wouldn't even be at this podium... giving this speech.

That shows how much one mistake can effect everything."

I choked back tears. I don't want to cry in front of all these people.

"I don't know why they're having me give this speech. Mynce died 4 years ago, and this isn't even her class. I guess it's because no one knows her how we did, and she's the only girl that died young at this school."

I decided to cry. I'm feeling emotional, and I'm not gonna hide it anymore.

"The world shows no mercy. None. They don't care about what you've gone through or how you're feeling—it will take you and everything you love. Mynce had gone through so much, and was becoming happy for the first time in her life. But the world didn't care. She still lost her unborn baby and spent her last days in a coma."

The world didn't even let her say goodbye...