its all because of the past (shinkami)(sad kami)

number 1

warning homophobia and slurs are used 

Denki's pov

Today was an interesting day Mineta got kicked out, not surprised but he was replaced by Shinsou and is it just me or was he hot i mean good looking, no handsome no wait above average looking male that i am not supposed to be attracted to. Anyways i'm not sleeping again because those nightmares will keep me up and they are not fun ,..... they make me hate my self even more and i don't need that right now. ..............What time is it ? 2: 47 great and that's why it's bad to have a computer i never get any sleep ...... Wait i wanted that never mind it's great. I'm hungry i'll get a snack . I think to my self after i got up from my bed to the kitchen i grab four rice krispies and, went to the couch got myself comfortable as i open my first one then i hear footsteps? i think to myself thats weird no one usually up at this time i look up from my snack and see Shinsou?

"Uh hey what are you doing up at this time ?"Shinsou said nervously 

"I'd say the same to you "

"Can't sleep "he said 

"Same here, want one"i said offering the rice krispie

"Sure thanks"

He says sitting next to me it's pretty weird having someone next to me at like three in the morning but it's nice 

"Hey are you usually up at this time?"he says

"Yeah i guess what about you?"i say opening my third rice krispie  

"I have insomnia so yeah i am usually up at this time "

"I have nightmares and it's not fun"

Next thing i know im at home in my room i hear my dad coming upstairs walking down the hallway i hear banging coming from my door

"Come out you waste of space"

At this point i'm shaking to grap that handle ,knowing whats coming next i close my eyes hoping it's a dream i wanna wake up please wake up .The door bursts open and there he is, he walks up to then slaps me harshly  my legs give up on i end on the floor  he throws kicks and punches at me he starts insulting me 

"You freak of nature  " 

"Monster"

"Piece of shit"

"You fag" that one hurts so so much  

"I can't even call you my son anymore"

Sometimes i believe him everything he says ,its painful to live like this i wish it was a dream .I hear a faint sound its getting louder 

Denki Denki wake up its a dream wake up Denki 

I wake i see Shinsou it was a dream oh thank god it was a dream a nightmare 

"Are you all right? you were shaking and crying are you ok?"

"Yeah i'm fine it was a dream after all "

"Did not seem like a regular dream do you want to talk about it "

"I'm fine really "

"If you want to talk about it you know were to find. it's four thirty i'm going to get ready see you later  "

"Yeah see you later"

I start walking to my room and think did he really care if i was ok he really is good looking  but why do i keep thinking like this i changed i'm straight again i swear i have to be to stop the dreams the pain why am i like this why just stop why can't i control this why it's so annoying once i get to my room i get ready and put on my make up to hide the bangs under my eyes i know its weird for a boy to put on make up I've always been told that but it's not my fault i'm like this its not my fault i'm weird it's  ....not ...my .... fault that i'm ....gay 

 hi it's me I hope you liked it if there's mistakes please tell me thank you