If your trying a pacifist route, you probably hadn't gained any L.O.V.E and there for may not have any experience FIGHTing. The best way I have found to beat her without killing her, is when you are in the RUINS buy something from the "spider bake sale," dont eat it until you reach her in HOTLAND. Once you get into her fight, eat the donut/cider that you bought in the RUINS, it's best to do this ASAP in order to avoid her "pet." She will accuse you of stealing and try to feed you to her pet, then a small spider will come in and alert her that you bought the donut/cider from the spiders in the RUINS... then she will let you go and you can spare her and continue through the underground.
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A Glitches Guide To Game Strategy
AléatoireJust a book where I show my opinions of the easiest and quickest way to do stuff in games