Fedya X BootsDepartmentStore

:))

Honestly it's 3am and I'm finding this fucking hilarious, Fedya darling I'm so sorry and I'll delete this soon 😭
Honestly this should've stayed in the drafts.

Mr Fedya, Fyo, Randy Earley didn't know a trip to the pharmacy was about to change his life forever.
He rolled out of bed at about 7 or 8, who really cares, not that he had slept. Today was a big day, he was going to Boots to buy some toothpaste and soaps in hopes that his fans would quit yelling at him.

Now the first rule of boots is you have to be looking 10/10 so our good friend Fedya decided to colour his eyelids red and poke himself with the eyeliner a few times. (You look lovely Fedya)

Next he walked into his closet, said hello to Adam and grabbed his ripped jeans. I know what you're thinking but no, this rip was purely put there so Fedya could imitate Them. Perhaps he would have to buy a sewing kit at Boots.

So Fedya left his house, probably pissing off many siblings along the way, after making 30 twitter posts, he stole a child's bicycle and made his way to Boots ™️.

The Boots store was a lovely looking lady, even finer than Claire's Accessories. Fedya could hardly believe the beauty infront of him! He picked up the nearest stick (coincidentally an old mans walking stick) and started twirling it in attempts to win the favour of The Lovely Boots Store. He looked majestic and it totally worked. The Boots store was completely smitten and did that Debby Ryan bang thing. Fedya knew he was in love.

After dancing around the Trê a few times Fedya got down on one knee.

Unfortunately stores are quite tall so when he looked up to make eye contact, Fedya stumbled slightly.

He needn't have worried though because at the first wobble, the Boots Department Store wrapped her arms around Fedya. Fedya nestled into Boots' long blue acrylics, laying in one like a acrylic hammock.

He Felt Safe
He Felt Loved
He Married Boots ™️

He still wouldn't stop thinking about Them 😔

OK THATS IT I PROMISE AND IM SORRY. Now what do I tag this monstrosity. Fedya if this doesn't make us friends I don't know what will.