Thanatos Hates Thanos

When Thanos snapped his fingers.......

Nico was just chilling with his boyfriend, Will, at Camp Half-Blood. They were chatting and relaxing, glad that they finally had some peace and quiet.

It had been some time after the Giant War and they had gotten together recently. They found that when they were together, they were much happier, resulting in both of them being much more joyful.

"Isn't this nice, Nico? It's so quiet and peaceful." Will sighed contently, snuggling with Nico.

Nico gently smiled. "Yeah, it is nice." He closed his eyes, resting his body onto Will's.

Suddenly, an Iris Message appeared in front of Nico.

"Nico!" Hades yelled out from the Iris Message.

Startled, Nico jumped up, his eyes open and alert. When he saw that it was Hades, he relaxed slightly.

He internally groaned and ran his hand through his hair. "Yes, father?"

"I know I don't normally ask you, but Thanatos and I need help in the Underworld."

Nico raised an eyebrow. It was rare that Hades and Thanatos needed help, seeing as the two were very good at their jobs. Nevertheless, Nico sighed and responded. "Alright, I'll shadow travel down there right now."

He then swiped his hand through the Iris Message, ending it.

Turning to Will, he gave a sad smile. "Guess I have to go down to the Underworld. I'll see you later." He gave a smile and then promptly shadow traveled away. (OMG LMAO I ACCIDENTALLY WROTE AGAY AND IT AUTOCORRECTED BUT I KINDA WANTED TO KEEP IT)

Down in the Underworld......

"WHERE THE FUCK ARE ALL THESE SOULS COMING FROM????????"

Those were the first words that left Nico's mouth when he got to his father and Thanatos.

"Apparently, there's this alien guy in the mortal world and he did this snap thing that made half of the mortal population disappear into some dust or whatever, which basically killed them! So now, we have about 3.5 billion souls running around the Underworld like headless chickens!" Thanatos shouted while trying to guide a group of roughly 100 souls.

Nico was flabbergasted. Who the hell in the mortal world had the power to snap their fingers and kill half the world's mortal population? The person was probably dead, anyways. Doing that would take a lot of work for a mortal.

Ignoring his thoughts, Nico soon hurried to help Thanatos and Hades handle the souls.

It had taken Nico, Thanatos, and Hades weeks to handle all of the souls in the Underworld. Nico felt like he was going to pass out from the amount of work. And so he did just that when he shadow traveled back to his cabin.

Will, who went into Nico's cabin because he forgot something in there and he just realized it, was quite shocked to see Nico in his bed, fast asleep.

Forgetting that he had gone into the cabin to grab his sweatshirt which he left in his cabin, (which Nico had stolen by the way) Will made his way to the sleeping Nico and got into the bed.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When every.single.fucking.person came back to life

It was a regular day in the Underworld, all of the souls were just chilling.

The 3.5 billion people who had died 5 years ago were for some reason only allowed in Asphodel and Elysium, most just in Asphodel. None could rebirth, either. And what was even more peculiar was that all of them seemed to be just a little bit alive, a small part of all their souls still remained on Earth.

Nico, who had taken up a job working together with Hades and Thanatos in the Underworld, was just doing his daily job.

In the past five years, Nico and Will had also gotten married, and they settled on both their last names to be Solace, Will's last name.

So, Nico di Solace was taking a break and hanging out in Elysium with the dead people. Nico had also met a couple new people from the 3.5 billion people who had appeared 5 years back, who had ended up in Elysium.

It was a small handful, but they had become good friends with Nico whenever he visited Elysium. He met Peter Parker, who had a very interesting life as Spider-Man. Peter had reminded Nico of when he was younger, happy and energetic. Nico also met Hank Pym, Janet van Dyne, and Hope, their daughter. The three of them seemed to be superheroes or heroes of some type in the mortal world, which amused Nico. Hope's attitude was a little like Thalia's, in Nico's opinion.

Nico had also met another confusing bunch of people. First, he met Lily Potter. She was smart and reminded Nico of Annabeth. Then he met James Potter, who was like a mix of the Stoll brothers and Percy. Soon after that, he met Sirius Black, Remus Lupin, Nymphadora Tonks, (I love her!) Ted Tonks, Andromeda Tonks, Cedric Diggory, Alastor Moody, Albus Dumbledore, Fred Weasley, Colin Creevey, Lavender Brown, (Nico didn't like her much though) and many others. (Did I get them all?)

Apparently, they had all died in a wizard war or something before that. They were all wizards or witches, which was pretty cool to Nico. Although, when he heard about how they died, he felt kind of bad for them. Nico made good friends with most of them, too. He also secretly shipped some of them too.

For example, Sirius and Remus were dating (I'm pretending Remadora never happened, sorry) before they died, and they were absolutely adorable together. James and Lily were also very loving, but also sounded just like Percy and Annabeth when they bickered.

While Nico was chatting peacefully with Lily, something odd started happening. First, Peter (No, not Pettigrew. Fuck that traitorous rat) started to disintegrate into dust. Soon, Hank, Janet, and Hope began to turn into dust too.

Confused, Nico excused himself and ran over to Asphodel, where all the souls who had come in 5 years ago, began to turn into a similar dust.

On the way, he passed the Fields of Punishment and saw Dolores Umbridge, a woman he grew to hate when he heard about what she did when she was alive, by Fred Weasley. His father had actually allowed him to choose what her punishment was after Nico begged him to. Now, Umbitch was stuck writing lines forever with her own blood quills, which carved bloody, ragged words into her skin. Nico had even gone the extra mile and made it so that the pain was never ending.

Anyways, Nico then shadow traveled back up to the mortal world, and saw that there were hundreds of people reforming from dust in front of his eyes. To out it in short, all of the 3.5 billion people they had handled 5 years ago were all coming back to life.

In shock, he went back to the Underworld, seeing Hades and Thanatos stressing out.

Then he proceeded to bash his head against the wall. Repeatedly.

"SO.MUCH.PAPERWORK."