Coming Home

1

"I miss you, I can't wait for you to come back so I can see you." Cheryl's voice is crackly through the receiver.

Toni sighs on the other side of the line, thousands of miles from Riverdale; she's in New York and Cheryl is home.

"What? What, I can't say that I miss you? Toni I haven't seen you in months?"

"Cheryl" she says quietly, "Cheryl I'm not coming home, I-"

"Not coming home?! Toni you, you haven't been home in 3 months what is this? What is this about is it me? You don't love me anymore?"

"No Cheryl its not- that isn't it, I just made a different life here, I don't want to go back to Riverdale- back to the South Side...it isn't me anymore, it isn't my home anymore." Toni struggles to say what she wants as she paces around her small dorm room.

"I- Toni am I not your home anymore? Are you breaking up with me right now?"

"I don't want to but-"

"Then don't! Toni?" Cheryl takes a sharp breath, "What can I do? What did I do?"

"It's nothing you did Cheryl, it's not like that, there's nobody else, it's just me Cheryl, it's not the same when I'm away from you and I don't want to leave the career and life I've started to build here."

Cheryl's voice becomes quiet, "Is it even worth arguing with you about this? You don't want me anymore?"

"I'll always want you Cheryl, I just- I shouldn't have you right now...we're apart and I am building a new career."

"oh-kay" her voice is shaky, "Bye Toni, I love you."

"I lo-" Cheryl hung up on her. 

She couldn't blame her, they made it to her Senior year of college and now was when they broke up, when it was almost over.

-

"Oh, uh-yeah my last relationship was with a girl from my hometown. I don't think I could ever love someone else that much" fuck Toni visibly cringes when her date's face falls, because of course it would, she just told her she was basically incapable of love. 

"I'm sorry I- I didn't mean it like that at all" Toni tries to backtrack and put her hand over the girl's across the table, but her date pulls away. 

"Yeah, I think I'll let you come to terms with whatever that  was...goodnight Toni" her date is kind enough to place a hand on her shoulder and a soft kiss on her cheek as she leaves. 

Toni throws the napkin off her lap and onto the table, letting her head fall into her hands. That was awful. She is a terrible date. That's why she doesn't usually do it.

Truthfully, she had met the girl on tinder; but still she had been bombing all night, and saying she could never love someone like Cheryl was the last straw. 

She shakes it off when the waiter comes over with the check "I thought you might need this" he says with a smirk. She can't tell if that's his attempt at a sympathetic face, or if he just watched her crash and burn for the last thirty minutes.

Either way she glances at the check, takes a couple twenties out of her wallet and quickly grabs her jacket and leaves.

The crisp New York City weather chills her as she tugs on her coat and starts her walk home. She cringes at a text from Fangs, "How was the date, Tiny!" he adds an overly smiley emoji, and Toni sighs. 

"Could. Not. Have. Been. Worse." she grumbles as she sends it, and puts her phone away for the rest of her walk home. 

As she turns onto her street, she sees a happy couple. They hold hands, huddle close, and hang on every last word the other says. Toni kicks rocks for the rest of the way to her apartment, and drags her feet along the staircase until she reaches her own.