The Girl in the Sunflower Field

Sunflowers

It was a warm summer's evening when I decided to stop by a sunflower field near my parents house. I went there as a kid and would just fuck around in the grass and scare the shit out of my parents. Let's just say I stopped going there after a while, which, I get since I was being an ass.

However, the reason I decided to go there today is because of a memory of mine that came to me yesterday. One day, me and my parents decided to visit the sunflower field like any other day. Except, this time, there was someone else. They looked to be the same age as me, thank god, and so, I was pretty excited, I mean, my parents lived in the middle of no where so I didn't get to see kids around my age all that often. Well, besides my brother and sister and cousins that would visit every once in a while. But, I wasn't completely reckless. I got the classic stranger danger talk and that included kids so, I proceeded with caution. Once I got a closer look I could see a girl in braids with strawberry blonde hair in a yellow shirt. I also saw some burgundy, knee length shorts, covered with an army green jacket that looks a little too big for her, and a way too big sun hat, with a pair of sunglasses.

Even at 7, I could tell that that combo made no sense. She spotted me and jumped a little. I don't remember what happened after but I remember having a lot of fun and maybe thinking she was the tiniest bit, cute. We would meet everyday for a week and just play around in the sunflower field. If I were to just run off to some friend now, there's no way my parents would let me but, back then they didn't mind as much since we were so secluded. For some odd reason that memory stuck with me for a while. Maybe it was because when I went to the field the days after that week, she was gone without a single word. And the next, and the next, and next, until I eventually lost interest, as kids do. But, now, at 24, this memory has come back to me and makes me want to go back to the field, in hopes she's there. Though, she probably isn't I mean, it's been a whole seventeen years since we last met but, who knows, maybe she is still there.

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I put on my shoes and began walking to the sunflower field. I surprisingly didn't get lost, and somehow remembered how to get there. Once I arrived I was met with the incredibly nostalgic view of the tall sunflowers dancing in the wind surrounded by a field of grass, facing the sun, as they do. You could hear the sound of cicadas in the distance. Last time I was here, the sunflowers would tower over me. I enter the field and begin to wander. I turn to my right and see a girl. Wait, is it...?

"Hello?" The girl turns around and I see her large sunglasses and strawberry blonde hair. Oh shit.

"Uh, you probably don't remember me but we used to hang out in this field when we were seven. Or- well- when I was seven, since you never told me your age or your name." Oh wait I just realized that they probably don't remember me. Damn, I must look like a creep right now. "Oh, um, sorry, I uh-"

"No, wait, I remember you." I turn back around and turn bright red. Why am I embarrassed?

"Oh, well, uh, hey." Hey? Hey? The fuck did I say "Hey" for that's so-

"Hey." They giggle and my ears become hot. What is wrong with me, I'm not some 15 year old kid anymore who gets red the moment the person they like notices them. Well, maybe I am but I don't even like her! I think? It wasn't long before I realized that an awkward silence was present.

"You just gonna stare or...?" She says in a concerned tone.

"Oh, ha, ha, yeah, um, so, lemme just go on over to you." I walk over to her stiffly with red ears. Once I reach her I'm met with a faint smell of strawberries coming from her. Is that weird? I mean, she smells really nice. Yep, yeah, that's weird I'm gonna stop right there.

After that incredibly uncomfortable introduction, we started to relax a bit more and began to just talk. It was about useless jumbo and none of it really had any meaning but, I felt at peace with her. With the combination of her soothing voice and the soft strawberry smell coming off of her, I felt so comfortable. During this moment the memories of our first meeting came back to me in soft waves. I remember playing hide and seek, running around with her, catching bugs, and holding her...hand. Holding her hand.

After looking away from her for a moment to find the courage to, um, hold her hand, I let out a soft sigh and tap her hand lightly with my index finger.

"Mind if I um, hold your hand?" I say nervously. Maybe it is lame of me to ask permission to hold her hand, but I don't just wanna grab her hand out of no where if she doesn't want to. Oh wait- "Oh, um, before you answer let me just dry my hands real quick." I rub my hands against my clothes rapidly as she chuckles. God, I'm so lame.

"Yeah, you can hold my hand." She extends her hand and hold it lightly and we meet eyes. I quickly look away cause that shit is way too intimate and my cheeks begin to flush.

We stay like that for a while and I glance over and see that she's blushing too. I start to feel less embarrassed and more giddy.

"Are you blushing?" I say in a little too excited tone. She quickly turns to me with an embarrassed look.

"Oh shut up, you started blushing the moment you saw me!" She says teasingly. I feel so exposed and go silent.

"Pfft-" we burst into laughter and fall on our backs. I look over to her and we meet eyes again. This time I didn't turn away immediately. Our laughter calms down and we just kinda look into each others eyes. At least I think so, I can't really tell with the sunglasses.

"Let's meet again." I say, breaking the silence. I look at her with my eyebrows slightly furrowed and lips pursed as I anxiously anticipate her response. She gives me a warm smile and tightens her grip on my hand a bit.

"I'd love to."

We meet everyday, for a week like the last time we met and on the last day I ask her the question that's been bugging me since the first time we met.

"Why did you leave?" She stops walking and tightens her grip on my hand, a little tighter than last time. We were taking a walk by the way. A pause fills the air as she stands there in silence. I quickly begin to regret asking her and start sweating. Why did I have to ask her, I could've lived my life not knowing why...Right?

...No, I couldn't. This is something that's bugged me for seventeen years, I should at least be given some explanation as to why. She looks over to me with a somber look on her face. She lets out a sigh and gives me a smile. And then, she was gone the next day. My heart began to ache and I felt somewhat betrayed. I'm not even sure I should, but I do. I begin to cry as I lay in that sunflower field. It felt like this would be that last time I saw her for some reason and it crushed me. After I recollected myself, I stood up and wiped away my tears. I let out a deep sigh and looked over the grass and flowers facing the sun and I smiled.

"To another seventeen years, Girl in the Sunflower Field."

The End🌻