✓ 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐜𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐦𝐨𝐨𝐧 | 𝐣.𝐣𝐤

the crescent moon

"and the last thing i see before i close my eyes is 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒄𝒓𝒆𝒔𝒄𝒆𝒏𝒕 𝒎𝒐𝒐𝒏."

the final moments of jungkook's life.

TW: suicide

© SEEKINGSEROTONIN 2020

☆

well, this is it.

loving for eternity,

jeon jungkook

i write the last line of my note as i look up to my ceiling, at the noose, right in front of my window. did the previous owner of the house put that hook there for a reason? maybe they knew someone would eventually fucking hang themselves here. shouldn't i be crying right now?

maybe i already cried myself out writing the note, looking back to the paper before me, littered with tear stains, but you could still read what i wrote. almost five pages worth of my anguish and tales of failure. i honestly i thought i would write more.

i get up from my desk and look at my red, puffed face in the mirror on my door. the last time looking at myself. damn, i looked fucking horrible, but at least i was in my favorite t-shirt and jeans.

i move the chair from my desk to directly under the noose. it's not time yet though.

i grab my phone and send my last messages to my friends.

namjoon.

taehyung.

jin.

hoseok.

yoongi.

jimin.

all the same message:

goodbye to you, my friend. this is the last message i'll get to send to you. by morning, i will be dead. it is too late for me now, 10 years too late. i hope you are to do amazing things with the rest of your life, things i cannot do now. i hope you remember me as a happy soul, though. please don't remember me for my demise. please keep the memories we've had together. graduation, road trips, anything that helps you feel better about me. i love you,

jeon jungkook.

i leave my room, placing my phone on my desk, and go get a water bottle and an apple. my last meal. on the way back to my room, i pause in the hallway. my brother is still awake, probably drawing something. junghyun is always awake in the crazy hours of the night. i go into his room.

"oh! you're awake." he exclaims as i go to sit on his bed. i don't know if it was the lighting in his room, but he didn't acknowledge my face.

"what's with the apple and water?" he asks.

"oh, i was.. um, just hungry." i lie. "you ok?" he looks at me with a concerned look.

i can't tell him.

"yeah, why do you ask?" i respond, putting the items in my hand on the bed.

"i don't know, something about you seems... off."

"well, i'm fine." i get up and stand next to him. he then suddenly hugs me.

"i love you, little bro. you gotta tell me if something's wrong, okay?" he whispers, messing with my hair a little.

it takes everything in me to not start crying again.

"i love you too, jonghyun. i think i'm gonna go to sleep now." i say, releasing myself from his grasp and picking up my apple and water bottle.