British Rose

12. Where Were You In The Morning?

Tuesday, 17th of September 2019 – Holmes Chapel

Cold. The first thing Harry noticed when he woke up was the cold. A cold not like a freezing winter day, more like an absence of heat. The heat of a warm body. His bed was empty. He had the giant mattress to himself, as Aria was sleeping in her own room for a few weeks now. Every now and then, she came tapping quietly into his room in the morning to get some cuddles, but most of the time in this house, he woke up alone. After spending the last days with Charlotte, the emptiness of his bed here was a heavy contrast. He looked at the clock on his nightstand. It was analogue, carved out of oakwood and possessed exactly two features besides showing the time: an alarm function and a light. No snooze button, no radio. Harry tried to avoid taking his phone into his bedroom when going to sleep. Some points of an article about sleep hygiene he had come across years ago had stuck with him and he tried his best to stick to them when he was at home. Right now, the clock showed 8:15 am. An okay time to get up, but he found his body glued to the mattress. His to-do list for today was nearly empty. The day was intended to be a space for him to settle back into family life and map out the next weeks. There were a lot of pages to be filled in his planner, he probably would get on a call with Jeffrey later in the afternoon. Harry loved his work with all his heart, and all the people he got to spend a lot of time with because of it, like his manager. Somedays, though, he wished for a normal job. One where there weren't so many extremes, highs where he wouldn't get off the phone during the day and meet 20 new people or the buzz of tour life (although that was the best kind of stress); and lows like right now with weeks where there suddenly was nothing to do at all, planning days like today mixed in-between. He wasn't one to complain. But the rapid changes were sometimes hard to digest, and he found himself often unable to relax when there were a few days off in his calendar, because flipping forward one or two pages it was crazy busy again.

However, the long weekend at the seaside had felt like his batteries were completely recharged. He had heard about that phenomenon from other people. Jeffrey always talked about how Glenne, his girlfriend, was better for his mental health and relaxation than any expensive vacation. Or his sister Gemma often mentioned how her boyfriend calmed her inner chaos with simply his presence. Charlotte seemed to have a similar effect on him. How lucky he was. How badly he missed her already. The day felt cold, grey, like dust had settled over a beautiful piece of furniture and taken away the glow of the golden paint.

Sighing, he flipped back the duvet and hopped out of bed. No use dwelling on his feelings now. He accepted them, as there was a clear reason detectable, but decided consciously not to be eaten up by them. No drowning in sadness today. He would watch the waves from the shore. Keep a safe distance.

After a shower that lifted his mood a bit, he chose a funny shirt with some fruit on it and comfy cream Gucci pants from his closet, then wandered downstairs to check on the rest of his family.

Anne was sitting outside, wrapped in a knit cardigan to protect her against the morning cold, enjoying her first cup of coffee. Watching her two cats lay around lazily, she enjoyed the quiet moments of the morning she had to herself. Her granddaughter was still sleeping. Aria had been knackered yesterday after staying up later than usual to see Harry coming home. The reunion had been as cute as usual. The happiness and love on both of their faces when they were together always warmed her heart. There was simply nothing like a father-daughter-connection. Anne was happy for her son that he got more time with his daughter now after tour had finished and studio time was still a few months away. Seeing your child grow up is something you can never get back. She was worried about her son a lot, since he always had to balance the passion for his job and spending as much time as possible with the unexpected greatest love of his life. Plus, everybody also needed some time alone to recharge. It rarely was an easy bargain between the three. She really wouldn't want to trade with Harry. Anne tried to support him as best as she could and she would never complain about the amount of time she could spend with Aria which was certainly more than other grandmothers got, but she couldn't bear it all for him. She made a note to tell him more often how good he was doing, though.