Scared of A Pure Love

Chapter 1

Crying. That's all I could do. It was like there was a heavy building on my chest causing shortness of breath. I wanted peace, and I wanted it now. Who would have thought being such a great person can cause this much pain. But does he even care, that I cry every night? Red bloodshot eyes, stuffy nose, pounding headache, and all I have to show for it is the stained sheets with mascara and snot. I wanted more than this, I deserve more than this. I couldn't help but cry, curled up the corner of my room. " Baby, get up." He sighed. I didn't budge, he does this all the time. " Baby you know I love you, you know what it is." I'm just couldn't believe this was really what it came down too. I got up, and dust my clothes off with tears still in my eyes. I let out an exhausting sigh and headed for the door without thinking twice to stop and speak to Terrance. My mind was racing and I couldn't control it. With one foot, slowly in front of the other, I made my way towards the kitchen. I grabbed my keys and water and started to make my way to the front door. " Where are you going?" Terrance asked me. I stopped in my tracks and slowly turned around with tears streaming down my face. " Why does it matter to you, we aren't together right? & you want her right? So go ahead, don't let me stop you. I want nothing but happiness for you." My face red as hell, tears steaming, and my heartbreaking, I turned back around and headed out the door. " Ariel please wait." He expressed as I shut the door and didn't look back. 

I drove down the street not knowing where i was going. I just knew i needed a break from there. I tried my hardest not to go off like i wanted to. Because was it worth it? Probably not. Because honestly it was my fault that i even catered to someone who wasn't my man, but my friend. I should have know, I should have seen the signs. But as a female, I became attached to the way he would hold me, love me, motivate me, and fuck me. All this without a title. I was speeding down the street, running red lights, and stop signs. I couldn't help but be mad at myself. My phone constantly rang off the hook. Terrance calling me back to back. I ignored it. Turned my phone off and drove to the nearest hotel. I pulled into the parking lot and shut off the car. I took a minute to get myself together before i went inside. 1,2,3,4 breathe and releasr. I hopped out the car and head for the enterance. " Welcome to Double TreeTop by Hilton, checking in?" The person behind the desk asked me. I nodded yes. Literally all i needed was a great nights rest with no distractions and no pain. The service man was very attractive. Tall, brownskin, nice plumped lips, braids down the back. And he looked like he worked out too. " Excuse me miss, can I have a name? " I snapped out of my daze and smiled, damn he caught me off guard. " Yes, Areilella" He handed me a key and touched my hand. His hands were so soft, just what i needed at the moment. A mans soft touch to hold and love me right. " You enjoy your night, and if you need anything please don't hesitate to call." He said as he looked into my eyes. I looked away, and he chuckled. " Nah sweetheart, you're too beautiful for those tears to be in your eyes and for you to look away." I smirked. 'Who are you' i thought to myself. I grabbed the key out of his hand and headed towards my room. 227b. As soon as i made it to the door i found the nearest area to lay and fell asleep.

Terrance POV

"FUCK!" i screamed out loud. As she walked out the door. Never have i ever seen her get like this. Never has she ever walked away from me like this. I honestly don't understand what she wants from me. She knows what it is between us. I'm guessing that isn't good enough for her. Like yes i entertain these hoes but in all reality i want her. I'm just too afraid to show her and tell her. She's literally all the woman i need, but i'm afraid i wont know what to do with her. So it's easier to deal with the weak minded females. I've been blowing her up nonstop and now its going straight  to voicemail. Your call has been forwarded to an automated voice messaging system. " Reil, please answer me lets talk. Come back home, I'm sorry. Hit me back" I know i had too hurt her too bad this time. Listen, I'm a 23 year old male who lives with his best friend. And as you can see we have obviously had a thing before. See we dated a while back but we weren't ready and we didn't want to rush anything. Becuase honestly i knew she is were i wanted to be but i kept fucking it up. There isn't a thing in this world that girl wouldn't do for me. She cooks, clean, does my laundry, spoils me mentally, physically, spiritually,and emotionally. She supports me even when I mess up. She never judges me. She's my confidant. And she fucks me better than I have ever. She treats me like the King that i am. Now many ask " Nigga why won't you just settle down with her already?" And honestly i don't know. The way she loves me is a love i have never experienced and it scares me. She doesn't want anything from me. Just for me to be honest with her and love her. Niggas always tell me they finna cuff her and shit and i literally laugh in there face because they know i'd fuck them up over her. I know i need to get my shit together but i'm not ready yet.

I laid down in the bed staring at the ceiling. Wish this girl would call me back. I was tired of not knowing if she was okay. I didn't want to sleep alone. I missed her feminine touch. He warm body against mine. It was like part of me was missing because she wasnt here. I turned over and exaimed her side of the bed. The sheets were messed up, stained with massacra. My heart broke knowing i was the cause of her tears. I tried to call her one more time. *Ring Ring* The person on the other line sighed before speaking. " Yeah." She said as if she was still crying. " Reil come home, where are you? Nah fuck that come home." I said. The line was silent as if she hung up on me. " Hello?" I said confused as i looked at the phone. I mean it was still connected but she wasn't speaking. " Yeah I'm here. I just need some space tonight. I'll be home in the morning." My heart crushed. Knowing she was laying her head soemwhere that wasnt our bed. " Baby how about we stay on facetime until you fall asleep so you don't have to sleep alone." I said in hopes she said yes. It was more for me because i didn't want to be without her. She sighed and agreed. She propped the phone up and turned over to hit the light. " Goodnight princess" I said in my sleepy voice.  She let off a soft smile and closed her eyes. As she slept I admired her beauty. I had to be a real dumb ass to fuck up a perfectly great love. My eyes began to get heavy and i felt my body start to relax. It wasn't the same not sleeping next to her but i just didnt want to go the night without her. I know i may act as if i don't give a fuck, but trust me i do. I will do anything to get my baby back and i mean by any means necessary.