Beautiful Soul

Chapter 7: 2 years later

Here I was with two year old twins. I haven't seen or heard from my uncle since that night. I graduated from k-12 C.W. High School top of my class. My babies have grown so much in the last two years. It's amazing! Majesty can say her ABC's and Miracle can count to 20. Mama loves them, Caleb spoils them. At church everyone just loves them and holds them. I joined the praise team. I get to sing a solo. I'm 17 years old now. I'll be singing a song by Tasha Page-Lockhart called Why Not Me. Mom and I have been practicing the song for 4 weeks now.

I am sitting by first lady Beulah James. She's the god grandmama to the twins. I don't know how to feel to be honest. I've never sang in front of people except in the church in Columbia before, Ms. Charlotte and her sisters Sheila and Janessa are my background singers. I look up at our pastor bishop Phillip J. James and he looks at me. "Good morning church!" We reply with a good morning. Minister Micah looks at me. "You ready sweetheart?" I nodded and stood up, the same church mothers who bashed me were the same women who were now supporting me. "Mahmah!" I heard and made eye contact with Majesty, who was being held by ms. Kenya. Miracle looked at me and waved she was being held by ms. Pamela. I looked at my mama and she had her phone out. The music started and then I went into my zone. I opened my mouth and I started singing

"When I look in the mirror, I see a girl Beautifully broken, perfectly flawed I don't even know how I made it this far And I'm asking myself questions like Why did I do it? Why did this happen to me? Then I said, "You can get through it, you just have to believe '' What I do now, gotta make it all count So why not me? I'm the perfect person to go through the storm It won't break me, it won't kill me, I'll move on And then I'll come out even better than before And I'll never see this place anymore 'Cause my faith is gettin' stronger every day I'm removin' everything that's in my way And the fact that I survived another day Makes me say Why not me? Why not me? Why, why, why? One day I'm up, the next I'm down Problems comin' faster than I can count Who can I run to? No one to talk to Can't somebody tell me what to do? Why did I do it? Why did this happen to me You can get through it, you just have to believe What I do now, gotta make it all count So why not me? I'm the perfect person to go through the storm It won't break me, it won't kill me, I'll move on And then I'll come out even better than before And I'll never see this place anymore 'Cause my faith is gettin' stronger every day I'm removin' everything that's in my way And the fact that I survived another day Oh oh oh, oh oh This is my moment, there's no turnin' back It took me a while, but I have no regrets I've given my all, let go of the past I'm not gonna break, and I won't be afraid Oh, this is my moment, this is my time Just move out my way, 'cause I'm not backin' down Now that I realize who I am, I'm alive So why not me? I'm the perfect person to go through the storm It won't break me, it won't kill me, I'll move on And then I'll come out even better than before And I'll never see this place anymore (more) 'Cause my faith is gettin' stronger every day (day) I'm removin' everything that's in my way (my way) And the fact that I survived another day Makes me say Why not me? I'm the perfect person to go through the storm (storm) It won't break me, it won't kill me, I'll move on (on) Then I'll come out even better than before And I'll never see this place anymore 'Cause my faith is gettin' stronger every day (day) I'm removin' everything that's in my way (my way) And the fact that I survived another day Makes me say Why not me? Why, why, eh, why? Why? Oh, why why? Oh ooh, oh ooh Oh ooh Why? I can make it I can take it I won't break No, no, no, no, no Oh ooh, oh ooh Oh ooh, oh ooh Ooh ooh ooh Why not me?"

When I finished the song I was in tears! Mama was clapping and everyone was crying. The thing about it was I have never seen the presence of the Lord like I did today. I literally witnessed the spirit for myself and it felt great! "Praise the LAWD!!" M'Dear yelled and the whole church erupted in praise again. My babies were clapping because they  saw us doing it.

We were dismissed 30 minutes later. I felt better than I ever have. I smiled looking at my two angels in the backseat. Caleb was playing with Majesty. "Dada" I heard and looked at Miracle . She looked at me mama looked in the mirror Caleb stopped playing with Majesty and Majesty looked at Miracle. "What did you say Faith?" I said. She looked at me "DADA!" My stomach churned. "No dada! Her Mama!" Majesty yelled at her.