If Sushant's Back?

He's Dead?

Its 14th June and am watching Chichore for the 3rd time this week. I was loving every bit of it. am not much of a fan of sushanth but I don't hate him too. He's kinda cute. Am super excited for his next release Dil Bechara remake of fault in our stars.

Later that afternoon, I took my lunch and layed down for a nap. It was really quite and peaceful sleep until I felt fingers on me shoulder. I hesitantly opened my eyes and it was maa sitting near me. She was holding her mobile in her hand. And then came the words, that really hit me the hardest 'Sushanth Singh Rajput hanged himself. He is no more'

I was in half senses. And couldn't grasp what Maa just said. 'hmmm?' I said sheepishly. 'SUSHANT SINGH IS DEAD' this time I knew what I heard. 'HAAAA?' with broad open eyes is all that I could say. I took out my mobile to check if it was true and believe me i was praying it be a hoax.

I tapped google and was starting to type. 'sush...' and only with that google knew what I was searching for.

Laying down on my bed I saw his news of death. All of a sudden the world around me looked dim. I wasn't his fan neither was he any of my close ones. But this effect was killing me from inside. Tears were being pushed from inside. I could feel my right cheek to be wet. I tried to wipe it. But my body wasn't responding to my commands. I layed motionless. Staring at the ceiling fan. It was half an hour from when this news broke. I finally got the courage to check my mobile again to see what was the reason behind his death.

I donno for some reason I wasn't able yo believe he's gone. People uploaded statuses, i too was one among them. Many were talking about mental health and everything. I too was one among them. But I was genuinely hit with this. I really wanted that no body takes such a step. All I could see was tons of instagram posts on how other celebs are reacting to it or how cute innocent he was.

I couldn't look at him any more and switched to whatsapp to talk around to people and divert my mind. But all of a sudden a picture poped up and my heart stopped beating for a second. It was sushanth's dead body. He laying on his bed eyes unevenly open.

But the knowledge I had about hanging, didn't match any of the evidence around his body. It was very uneasy but i kept looking at that picture. I was sure he hasn't died because of hanging. I tried investigating.

Hours passed and all my movements were limited to the bed. My tears had stopped. But an unknown pain was still instilled in my heart. Breathing became really tough. That pain was as of a thick sword cutting my heart into two.

I walked to my mom and sat beside her.

She too was very silent.
None of members in family were talking, it felt as if our close relative has passed away. The environment inside the room was so gloomy that could even make any happy man sad.

The rest of the day passed on. Everybody was silent, sad and some where really angry.

It was night when I had my little supper and slipped in between sheets.
I was scrolly my instagram, all my feeds were filled with what Sushanth was, Nepotism, anti Karan Johar posts.

The reality hit me again. HE IS DEAD. THE PERSON I WAS ADMIRING IN THE MORNING IS DEAD and again my world shattered and i started weeping like a child does on the roads when not given what he wishes for. I cried howled so much that my mom came running to me to pacify me...