Why Alien?

Therapy-1

He grew up being told "be who you want to be"
But what happens if he doesn't know who he wants to be?
For he doesn't even know who he is
The drifting
The overthinking
The maybes
The why's
The. --
Oh shit , here is goes again.
Identification , again.
Me , again.
Which takes us back to "who are you"?
Who are you?
And why do you call yourself alien?

Well , it all started in a place called "the valley of darkness" where no truth will prevail but judgments and evil do.
Where everyone is so nice up until they drive you to kill yourself.
Might as well do so.
Incase you haven't noticed , that was my mind speaking.
All those "die , you're dead , suicide , cry , nothing will ever work" thoughts , all those "you're stupid" thoughts , he , he is tired of the overthinking.
But that's what it wants right , that's what the mind wants him to do , the mind is just like everybody else , nice to you till it pushes you to a point where you wanna kill yourself
This mind , this mind is dangerous.
This mind ??
Question was "why do you call yourself alien"

"Sorry.
Let's start over.
Ask again please."

"Why do you call yourself alien??"

I'm invisible.
You don't see me but I see you.
People are fighting on whether I'm existing or not.
They don't want me because I'll ruin everything
They are scared , scared of me.
I'll colonise their lives.
Their homes.
Their places..
Whatever , you name it.
I feel myself drifting from myself on a daily basis , I feel myself feeling trapped , screaming out for help but no one can here me.
I scream "help"
I scream "can anybody hear me"
I scream " 'can anybody notice me , I'm trapped"
You know that feeling , when you feel like you're caged like some animal and you can't even move.
That feeling when all you wanna do is cry but because you've done that too much already , the tears just don't come out anymore.
That feeling when you don't care anymore
That feeling when you don't cry anymore
That feeling when you don't get hurt anymore
That feeling when you wake up , and you're already wishing for the day to end.
That's when you know you've lost yourself
That's when you *think* you've failed
That's when you remember how you're still alive , but then ask yourself "how" & actually "why"
That's the mind.

"What's your favourite colour"

Black.

"Wow , why"

Because it's who I am
Black is Art
Black is Love to me
Black is lost to me
Black is finding who I am to me
Black is dark
And that's just me
It's me finding myself in a dark space feeling trapped watching everybody fight around me , yes around me yet no one notices me.
But maybe I don't wanna be noticed.
Maybe I wanna stay invisible
Maybe I wanna be in the croud but not in the croud
Maybe I don't wanna be here
Maybe I'm just okay with being alien.

(2.Alien-unfamiliar and disturbing or distasteful.)
(2 of 2.Alien-a hypothetical or fictional being from another world)

The words : Unfamiliar , disturbing , distasteful , hypothetical , frictional being , another world

Those words should say much to you , those words should explain to you
Those words
Those words are the words that explain me at best.
For I don't even know who I am , Unfamiliar
For I do stuff not many do , disturbing
For I cause dislike apon myself , distasteful
For to me , my life is just based on the hypothesis "happy to death" , hypothetical
For to me , I was just discovered , and now I guess my plane has crashed , frictional being from another world.

"But nothing makes sense , are you trying to say you are inexistent?"

Do aliens exist?
Well , that's something we'll find out soon enough