Misunderstood

High school is basically like the hunger games. They throw you In there and just expect you to do amazing. But you're only here to try to survive. That's what I'm doing here. I'm trying to survive in this messed up world and high school is just another piece of crap the world throws at you. People expect so much from you, they expect you to bring home straight A's. they think that you're the popular one at school with all these friends enjoying life and being free, when in reality... It's the exact opposite...How's straight C's and D's Mom? Sorry I'd rather be on the computer at home or stuck in my room than hang out with anyone from school. My life isn't what you'd think it is. You know how they show high school on tv and in movies how there's always the mean snooty girls and hot athletic guys, well that part is mostly true. And then there's the whole high school drama and people are miserable, well it's worse. The people that are miserable, well that's where I fit in. School is just another slap in the face. And I'm just waiting to get it over with.....

Day One: Thursday, Nov.29 11:56 p.m

My eyes are drowning in tears, my dreams are fading away, my thoughts are becoming the only thing that I have left. People are practically screaming in my face that I'm not perfect. Like I don't already know that I'm ugly, that I'm stupid, or that I can't do anything right, I'm not good enough, ok, I see that. I'm falling down, trying to catch a grip on something, but there's nothing there for me to hold on too. There's nothing at the bottom to cushion my fall. There's nothing there, nothing. How can I get back up when there's nothing for me to catch my balance. There is no help, there is no hope. There is just pain. Pain that cuts through your veins like a knife and you can't stop the bleeding, you can't stop the pain. You're trying to hold on but 'what's the point' keeps going through your mind, what's the point when there's always gonna be Someone to just push you down again. Going to bed just to wake up and see demons tomorrow, fuck school.