Was It Worth It?

Prompt 35. "Do you regret it?"

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Garfield walked into the dark room, almost slipping on a piece of fabric.

But can you blame him?

The room was a mess, pieces of fabrics, beads and thread scattered across the room. It didn't help that the only source of light was the dim light coming from the lamp, standing on the other side of the bedroom.

Under said lamp was Marinette, wearing a dazed expression as she stitched together two black fabrics.

She had been like that since that day, robotically doing her new routine as if nothing ever happened.

In the morning she would help in the bakery, go to school, go home and make lunch, work on commissions, bathe, sleep and repeat.

She no longer hanged out with her small group of friends. Whenever they'd invite her, she'd always turn them down, saying she had things to do.

Her grades no longer suffered but instead remained stagnant. All A+. It was too perfect, too concerning.

She had lost her spunk, the cheery everyday ladybug gone, but Garfield didn't care. He knew what she was going through. And it was a lot.

She never spoke about it, hell, she always strayed away from the topic.

Even at her therapy sessions she'd avoid it.

For the slightest mention of it would cause Mari to panic.

But at least with him, she would attempt to speak about it. Maybe it was because she knew he would never press her to continue if she didn't want to.

Garfield sat next to her, taking away the current work and set it beside them, taking her hands into his. They were cold.

They sat there for a while before Mari rested her head onto his shoulder.

"Do you regret it?" Garfield soft said, caressing her hand, drawing circles.

"No." A short, but honest, answer. "Not one bit." Marinette shifted in her spot. "It was for the best."

"For him or for you?" Garfield asked.

"Both." Mari said with a shuddering breath. "A reality check if you would."

Garfield could only hum in response. "He was never going to see me for Marinette. I would've always been Ladybug to him and nothing more."

"So that's why you erased yourself from his memory before he left for London."

"If he wasn't going to see me for me, then might as well let him continue to have the dream of meeting his Lady one day." Marinette hiccuped, her body then started to shake.

"Mari."

"He was never going to fall for Marinette Garfield." Marinette cried, shifting herself to look at him in the eyes. They brimmed with unshed tears. "All he saw was Ladybug Gar, Ladybug!" She screamed, sobs escaping her lips, the room filling up with her wails.

Garfield watched as she continued to cry into her hands, furiously wiping away at the falling tears that shed endlessly.

"He only loved Ladybug and no one else! The girl behind the mask? He said he'd love her too but he lied!"

Garfield pulled her into his arms, wrapping them strongly around her small frame.

"When he saw that it was me," a hiccup, "his face deflated before he plastered a smile to his face."

"Can you imagine the way I felt when I saw that?" Marinette wailed, sniffling. "When I was still two separate identities, Marinette and Ladybug have seen his genuine smile countless of times. But when I was both, that smile no longer appeared on his face."

Garfield felt her grab his arm, gripping at the sleeve of his shirt.

"I couldn't continue to live with that smile Gar. I couldn't, no matter how many times I pushed myself to live with it, lying to myself that he would fall for the girl behind the mask."

"But despite a year passing... he never did..." Marinette trailed. "So... I erased his memory of the reveal, I erased me from his life."

Marinette remained silent after that, only sobs and hiccups leaving her lips as Garfield continued to hug her and stroke her head.

All that pent up emotions were finally out, Garfield wanting to head out and call Damian for a favor, to skin the asshole that dared to break Mari's heart, but in the end chose not to.

"He doesn't deserve your tears Mari." He looked up past the ceiling hatch, seeing that the moon peaked from the corner. "He doesn't deserve your kindness and patience that you gave him." He wiped away the tears that slowly slid down Mari's pale cheek.

"You gave him the opportunity to change and he didn't use it. He didn't appreciate your gentleness with him, taking your sweetness for granted." Mari snuggled closer to Garfield, her head resting above his heart.

"So don't give him any more thought, he didn't care about you then and doesn't now, seeing as he no longer knows you."

Garfield planted a kiss on Mari's head, Mari shifting to look at him again.

"You don't need no boy to take over your thoughts and time that can be used for self care. Go have fun with yourself, have some 'me time,' travel if you need to."

Garfield gave Mari a squeeze, causing her to squeak. "I just want you to be happy Mari. I hate seeing you like this, I hate seeing you move forward and then drag yourself back."

"You willingly decided to remove him from your life. That's already taking a big step forward and now, you just have to take baby steps from there." Garfield sighed. "And if you need any help, I'm here for you." He planted a kiss on her forehead, watching a blush creep to her face, making her freckles more visible. "Always."

Marinette buried her face into his chest, mumbling something incoherent.

The night passed, Mari finally dozing off and getting a proper night's rest in his arms. Gar could only stare at her complexion, tucking a hair strand behind her ear.

As much as Garfield wanted to tell her how he felt about her, he knew it was the wrong time. He didn't want her to believe he was just taking advantage of the situation.

He'll wait for her to come around. He already waited for three years, another year wouldn't hurt him.

He'd gladly wait a century if that is what it took to tell her that he loved her.