SHE (On hold)

Chapter 14- The untold story

Megan P.O.V

I opened the letter trying not to make too much noise to disturb Ryan. It said.....

Try harder and maybe you'll get closer. Maybe Ryan is not what all he seems.

P.s : I've kept your boyfriend pretty for you. I'll help you on something.. Try to find Ryans' family.

My eyes widened and I held the letter close to my chest. How did he know?

No no no, this is not happening. I didn't even tell Jake that I liked him. Maybe he gave it away that one time he protected me. But he protected me from a bunch of students that were about to humiliate me, anyone would do that. How can anyone know about my feelings for him if I haven't uttered a single word to anybody, not even Jake. Maybe its a revenge ploy from the group of students that failed in humiliating me the first time round. But can this possibly be an act of a Student? The kids in school are not capable of doing such things. They're too busy updating their statuses on facebook or tweeting about their lives: Their much more interesting, rich lives.

These letters are driving me crazy.i may have benefitted at times from them, but now its taking too much control of my life. Come on come on pull yourself together .....I can feel a panic attack on its way. But as always. I'm unable to control it. My lungs tighten and I try to make way to the door, but I can't see clearly as my vision begins to cloud up. I gasp for air as my ankles buckle.

I open my eyes to find myself on a couch next to ryan. I don't really remember it being here before. And it feels awfully cold. Should have brought a jacket along with me. I see my bag next to me and the letter yet again in sight. I read it over and over again in an attempt to figure out how and why is this person doing whatever the hell is going on. I bite my nails as I attempt to focus and try to figure a way on why any of this is happening. Well I cant talk to Ryan to find out more about him. Maybe I can try to find his family like the letter suggests.

I move closer to Ryan who probably has no idea what is going on. I compose myself and whisper to him

" I'm going to figure this out. Or at least I'll do my best to figure this out. You stay safe and try to recover. "

I brush his soft hair with my hands before leaving to his place.

I pull up near his place. And walk to the door. After a few knocks I figured there's no one home, I decided to let myself in with the aid of a few lock picking skills. I realize that the house is empty and the furniture covered in white sheets. What about his family? Why aren't they here? Were they even here to begin with.. No this can't be. My mind cannot pull this one on me. It has successfully claimed years of my life. But not this time. Not again. I attempt to compose myself before another panic attack hits me. I sit on the stairs and hold my head in my hands. Maybe I just need to close my eyes and breathe...i inhale and exhale. Just like how she told me. Controlling my breathing ,keeping my eyes closed and my ears peeled for anything. Its been a long time since this happened. This routine of mine which I was so used to doing in a much colder and a more brutal place.

( flashback)

" Just relax megan. Just breathe.. one breathe at a time, you'll be fine.. Slowly"

My breathing slows down to her expected pace.

" okay now open your eyes".

I do as she says and look dead on at her emerald eyes.

" so tell me what you remember?".I raise an eyebrow. I don't get how am I supposed to remember everything to the detail. She immediately understood it, which makes this therapy session a little tedious to say the least. " just tell me as much as you remember". I nod and take a deep breath before I told her my story.