Swiper x Boots: A Crack Fic

Long Lost Lovers

A/N: i made this as a joke (originally) to show my friends but why not post it here, right? this is my first fic but, i haven’t read it myself, though. hopefully there aren’t much grammatical errors. enjoy!;)

“Swiper no swi—” Boots was on his way, only until he noticed the anxious frown on Dora the Explorer’s terrified face. Dora was merely trying to defend herself from the oh-so-frightening man in a sparkling blue mask, Swiper. Boots’s first instinct was to approach the two as fast as he could, running a hand through his silky, blue hair, with an attempt to give out a look of a true hero. The other was surprised, as Boots immediately grabbed the man in the mask by his neck, only getting closer and closer to his shocked and truly flustered face. Boots didn’t mind at first, as he was only filled with anger and disbelief that Swiper had threatened the girl he loved so much once again. Though, the girl with a frightened look loved him too, they were both unaware of how they truly felt.

Swiper let out a sigh, allowing boots to get a taste of his warm breath, which smelled a little too similar to the crusty apple pie which Dora’s grandma loved to make on Saturdays. He thought about how lovely this scent was, it almost felt like home. It was also his favourite snack, as he visits Dora during weekends.

“Oh, what’s this all about?” Swiper asks in a teasing tone, only causing Boots to look more furious than ever.

“Why do you always cause harm to my friend!” of course, Dora should’ve felt so much joy in this statement, as Boots was willing to defend her from the man in front of their eyes. Instead, she only felt even more despair when he referred to her as someone who is merely a “friend” to him.

The look on Swiper’s face was more intense than ever, “I-I only have one purpose! I-I swear that I have no intentions to harm your friend.” His voice trembles, “N-No bad intentions at all!”

“Tsk!” Boots let out a loud sigh, only after he clicked his tongue. “What could your intentions possibly be? Let me guess, steal the map from Dora? It was the map, wasn’t it? Do you know how valuable the map is to her? Of course you don’t. You’ll never understand the true value of her belongings. All you think about is yoursel—”

Boots’s eyes widened as he felt the grasp of Swiper’s hands on his teary face.

“It’s you, Boots.”

Boots was clearly left speechless. It was not something he would simply expect from a sneaky, sly man.

He let out a forced, but loud laugh. “You must be joking right? You’re surely mistaken. What would a criminal like you possibly want from a simple boy like me?”

Swiper bit his lip. This wasn’t working the way he wanted it to.

“I know you hate me.... you think of me as your enemy don’t you? Because you’re in love with Dora and you simply think that perhaps...I am too?” He added more emphasis on that last bit. “You always placed in your mind that I’m competing for Dora’s heart, but the truth is...

I’m in love with ~you~, Boots.”

Boots was left with no words to say. As much as he wanted to, nothing would come out of his mouth.

“Swiper, I—”

“It’s alright, Boots,” Swiper forces out a smile. “I know how unlikely it is, if not, impossible for you to suddenly develop feelings for me.” The smile had immediately disappeared from his face. “I’ll avoid the two of you from now on. I apologize for letting your little secret be not-so-much of a secret anymore. Anyways, go have a happy life, you two! I won’t be there to bother anymo—”

Swiper’s short speech was interrupted, as Boots had pinned him against the wall, only leaving him slightly breathless and more flustered than ever.

“Swiper....”

“B-Boots?”

Swiper stuttered. The masked man who had always put up a sly jerk facade is no longer the man he had always been known for.

He was left in tears. But not the devastating tears he had before his unknowingly emotional speech. The type of tears which were filled with mixed emotions, almost confusing enough to look too regretful, when it’s actually filled with so much joy, which only developed by time.

“I...I hadn’t realized it, not until now—I-I feel the same way for you, you sly man!”

“Boots, I—”

“Shush, my dear. You musn’t say another word. Your silly face is enough to make me feel regretful of the accusations I’ve said to you just earlier.”

It was awkward as it is, but even more awkward for the two as they remembered the girl who was just right behind them.

“But Boots, what about Dora? Are you in love with her too? What about the way she feels about you?”

“What about that? Why does what she feel matter? What you feel matters more, my love! I’m in love with you, and only you, Swiper. I truly apologize for not realizing this sooner. All this time i thought it was anger and frustration I had when I see you with her, until I realized I was angry because it’s her you’re with. As it turns out, anger turned into jealousy at some point.” Boots looked down in embarrassment. “Jealousy which always occured when you were only searching for her, not me.”

“I’m sorry, Boots. I always thought that,y’know.... that you would appear everytime I was close to her.”

After hearing their conversation, Dora’s mind short-circuited for a second, leaving her no choice but to run away from so much embarrassment.

The self-proclaimed protagonist felt as if she was antagonizing a tale of two regretful lovers, who she once thought were after her, and her only.

Afraid to admit that she took advantage of this in the past, she just kept running, and running, and running until she reached her grandmother’s house, with no more apple pie to spare her. The apple pie which she always waited for on Saturdays.

Not only did Swiper take her beloved boots from her, but also the delicious, crispy pie that was intended for her to eat and share with her friend, well, formerly friend, Boots.

It was disappointing indeed, but indeed a wonderful sight for these two men, who had their foreheads pressed against each others, as they were mesmerized with the other’s bright eyes.

Boots diamond eyes were like the waves of the ocean, so calming yet so loud. Loud enough for Swiper to hear his emotions, only by looking at the other’s eyes.

Swiper’s were brighter than ever, like the famously known sly fox was now a ball of sunshine.

It all ended as their soft lips pressed, like eating apple pie, except this one felt so much more delightful, and beautiful.

The taste of cinnamon, and the crispiness of crust became much more evident as the man with sky blue hair had kissed the ball of sunshine back.

“I’m in love with you, Boots.”

“I love you too, Mi amor.”