Flipside Interview (Transcript)

Flipside Interview - Benjamin Simmons (2021)

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INTERVIEWER: Hey everyone! Welcome to The Flipside, the show where we examine niche views and people who aren't getting, or don't think they need a voice. Today we're joined by Benjamin Simmons, a humanoid person of unknown origin!

BEN: Sup. I didn't expect so many cameras— uh, what's that thing up there?

INTERVIEWER: It's a microphone. Try not to focus on them, makes the nerves go wild!

INTERVIEWER: It's Oath time! Just a disclaimer to our viewers, and a solid reminder. This is a show about discussion. We draw conclusions on ideas, not character. Now Benjamin, do you take this oath, to focus your attention on the ideals at hand and engage in respectful, educational, and philosophical conversation?

BEN: (He takes a second to process.) Uh, yeah. I promise.

INTERVIEWER: So do I! Let's get on with the interview.

INTERVIEWER: Mr. Simmons, what are your views on the state of the world? Neutrality is not exactly smiled upon these days, so we'd like to hear your perspective.

BEN: y'know... I don't feel like doin' stuff most times. I hear about peeps gettin' hurt, gettin' bullied. People tryin' to do stuff about it. Stop it, somehow.

BEN: But it doesn't... (sighs, words dwindling, then motions vaguely to the area around him.) Y'wanna know a secret...? About... all this? Everythin'?

INTERVIEWER: Sure, just be mindful of the time. We're only on for a few minutes.

BEN: *Nods.* It ain't gonna be like this for long. And there's nothin' we can do. That's just part of it.

BEN: Y'know how I got here? The whole thing with Zalgo, Slendy — everybody knows, I guess. But maybe you don't,, so, I'll wrap it up for ya.

BEN: I... I was a kid, I tried doin' somethin' wrong to someone who did wrong to me.

BEN: I died, for the first time. Then I met him. Lord Zalgo, the big guy on top. Big red spiky.

INTERVIEWER: We've heard of him. I think we have an interview in place for next Wednesday.

BEN: Yeah. He made me a deal - I could go back n' finish what I started, and after it was done, I'd work for him, uh... forever.

BEN: I mean. I said yeah. Plus, uh, workin' for someone forever ain't dying. I dunno what happens with real dying, like, where do you go? I didn't wanna know so I picked his way.

BEN: Woke up, had powers. Fire, heat. I was faster. I finished what I came back to do, and,, uh... well. I was Zalgo's after that. He had me.... No. I killed, for him, and I killed for Slendy. I did bad things.

BEN: But the worst wasn't what I did.

BEN: Oh, uh, sorry— I think I'm takin' too long.

INTERVIEWER: (Looks at someone offscreen.) We're alright on time. Please continue!

BEN: Oh, k.

BEN: I... I don't think people know, but that Slendy virus ain't big. It's a... uh, whaddya call it...? Failed antidote?

BEN: Yea- to somethin' else. Zalgo's bit that's been goin' through humans. (He sighs again, more deeply.)

INTERVIEWER: Really? What do you suspect?

BEN: Slends is trynna stop whatever's gonna happen, but it ain't workin'. He kills peeps that have the infection.

BEN: Used to keep em around the mansion and make 'em his guys but, guess there were too many of us after some point.

BEN: Zalg has a virus out there. It's — it's hard to tell if y'have it. The only ones who know what's up is Slendy n his bros. Listen, y'wanna hear what's gonna happen once it spreads all over?

BEN: Hivemind, everyone becomes part of it. Underworld opens. Zalgo rules everything. Nobody gets free will but him n' his business partners.

BEN: I... don't want it to be that way. That sucks, man. But I mean, I'm TIED to him, y'know? I die, see him, come back. I couldn't - (he glitches, body distorting like a corrupted Twitch stream) - go forever if I wanted to.

INTERVIEWER: (Flinches at the glitch, then remembers the cameras and laughs quietly in showhost, listening.)

BEN: But it's gonna happen soon. I'm just bunkerin'. I dunno if it's better for everybody to be assimmell,, uh, what's it called. All part of the big Hivemind thing.

BEN: But the way I think of it, I'm gonna be here no matter what. Can't do anythin' big about it, it won't change anything.

BEN: Kinda how everything is. So. I'll be here.

INTERVIEWER: That was interesting! Well folks, that's all the time we have for today. Be sure to check out Benjamin's new book, ah... What was it?

BEN: I... I don't have a book or movie or anythin'. Your people called me in here.

INTERVIEWER: My producer is telling me that YOUR people called us and asked to be interviewed.

BEN: I — (he glitches) — I don't have people.

INTERVIEWER: ...

BEN: ...

INTERVIEWER: WELL that's all the time we have for today! Thanks for watching, and we'll see you next time on The Flipside!

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