it was an awkward ride home you could say. No one talked, and the people that were the extroverts in the group were in a different car. The people in the car consisted of Jimin and Yoongi in the front. As well as, Jeongguk and Taehyung in the back. The other car, which consisted of Hoseok, Namjoon, Jin and Doyoung, were all finishing up at the hospital and would join the others later.
Taehyung curiously stared out of the window. Taking in his current location, they stopped at the house and yet no body got out fo the car.
" uh Guk can you take Tae inside and familiarize him while i park?"
without saying a word Jeongguk just nodded and got out fo the car. He ran around to the other side and opened the door for Taehyung who flashed a small smile at him. Nothing on the outside had changed. The boys face looked the same, and his mannerisms were the exact same.
both boys got inside the house and stood in front of each other awkwardly, until Jeongguk extended his hand forward showing a beautifully authentic smile, " Hi I'm Jeongguk, you can call me as you please."
it felt weird being so formal to your best friend, he wouldn't lie, it hurt like a bitch. But he didn't want to risk losing a beginning and a chance with Taehyung.
Taehyung gently grabbed the hand, " Nice to meet you, I'm Taehyung," He paused, " i mean you probably already know that sorry. "
" hey it's okay, don't apologize. Is it okay if i show you around?" Jeongguks heart ached for Taehyung, the boy must be so lost.
Taehyung slowly nodded and proceeded to follow Jeongguk. He showed him around the kitchen, every room, except for Taehyung's own. He began to anxiously open the door as Taehyung stepped in with wide eyes.
" this is my room?"
he looked around and there were pictures scattered across the walls. His eyes roamed everywhere. His bed neatly tucked in, the dressing and study table perfectly organized and colour coordinated. As he was looking at all the pictures he came across one specific one.
it was new years countdown night and in the picture you could see Jeongguk kissing Taehyung's cheek, and Taehyung's eyes closed. The older grabbed the picture off the wall and read the message off the back.
"my beautiful tae" -jjk ♡ kth
" this picture..when was it taken?"
" new year's eve, 4 years ago." Jeongguk replied.
" are you like my boyfriend or something?"
that question left Jeongguk speechless, he wasn't his boyfriend. But they both previously had feelings for each other.
" uh i- no i'm not, but we had feelings for each other."
" do you still?"
at that Jeongguk remained silent. Of course he did, he fucking was in love with Taehyung since highschool. He really didn't know what to say.
Taehyung picked up on the silence, " i'm sorry, i'm trying so hard to remember." Near the end his voice broke, and so did Jeongguks heart.
Jeongguk carefully walked towards the space in front of Taehyung and looked him in the eye.
" it's not your fault, everything gonna be okay. i'm not forcing anything on you."
Taehyung shook his head and looked at the ground, then looked up. Repeating the same thing for a couple moments, " can you give me some time alone?"
Jeongguk hesitates before nodding and completely the request. However before he left, a book, specially Taehyung's diary, caught his eye.
he reached down to get it from the bedside table and handed it to the other, " here read this, it might jog something." With that he left the room.
Taehyung curiously eyed the unknown book in his hands and opened. There were scribbles all over the front page.
he began reading
" hi if you're here. welcome to this trash, i mean i guess you're trash too if you're reading this. Y'know i get so annoyed when people don't know how to use the right " your " and " you're " like fuck karen, learn it the right way. Well it's my birthday today, i think me and gukkie are going on a road trip to busan, i haven't met his mum in awhile. But goshhh i'm so old now, 18?!? damn that's absolutely crazy.
anygays should this book be aesthetic or just one of those books that you pull out of your ratchet school backpack? i'll try to update as much as i can, for now-
keep smiling, everyones fave taetae~~ "
Taehyung chuckled at the mini paragraph scribbled across the page. As well as the bunny and heart drawings. He flipped the page over and continued reading.
" january 1, 2016
i really don't know how to start these kind of things off, maybe i should ask hobi, his father is a literature professor. I had a pretty good birthday and we had a new year's eve party today. Gukk kissed me, it felt so nice. It felt like i was floating on the clouds weightles. It seemed like every problem went away and it was just me and him in that moment. Sometimes i think, would it be crazy if we got together? i mean we cuddle, we eat together, we basically are a couple with no title. Or would it be crazy if i tell him about my heart problems? it's not that i don't trust him, i do with the entirety of my soul, i'm just scared he'll worry too much.
but does he feel the same way? gosh Jeongguk if you're reading this right now, please stop laughing i really freaking like you okay? and i hope we're together in the future. i love you to the fucking ends of the earth Jeon Jeongguk, so so much.
kay i'm really really tired, and it's like 3 am. Everyone's dead asleep except for me. Till next time-
keep smiling, everyone's fave taetae ~~"
the boy sitting on the bed was lost. He had no memory of these feelings, he wanted to feel it all, he wanted it to all magically rush back but it wouldn't. It was impossible. However before he could flip to another page a knock was heard on his door.
≫ ──── ≪•◦ ❈ ◦•≫ ────
thank you for reading! knock knock july 20 2020, 12:08 am >> s
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