My breath hitched as I felt her body surrender to mine, her last breath against my neck as her hand fell to her side.
For a moment I felt as though all life had been drained from my being. No words would form in my head. Nakita ko ang paglapit ni Ma'am Johanna, running as tears flowed down her face. She knelt before us, palms to her lips as she wept.
No. This can't be true.
I snapped back to my senses, my hands now desperate as I held her shoulders, as though stirring her to life, but to no avail.
"H-haan," I felt another tear escape my eyes, "Grace?" I smoothed her face, the tears upon it still warm, "Grace!" A storm of emotions overcame my mind, and all the more tears lined my cheeks.
I shut my eyes, my palms clenching to a fist. Panginoon, nasa'n Ka? Bakit? Bakit ganito!? A wave of sorrow overcame me, a longing so strong that all I could do was hold her in my arms even more. I hung my head in defeat, weeping as I felt an arm upon my shoulder. She can't be gone. How? How could she have just gone like that? No. It can't be true. It can't be true.
Her face seemed to flash across my eyes as I gazed into the horizon, the trees' leaves swaying as the wind intermingled with it. The smell of grass filled my nose, the silent flow of the river a slight comfort to the heaviness that weighed down my being.
Days rolled by like the clouds above me, but over and over I feel as though it had been only yesterday that I've seen her smile, how her eyes narrowed when she laughed. Kahit na anong gawin ko, hindi matanggal ang sakit na tila ba naka rehistro na pagkatao ko. I had only felt like this once, and it was when my mother had died. I knew beginning the day the Lord had called me that hardships will come, but never had I expected this.
Once more warm liquid stained my face, a lump of bitterness rising to my throat. Bakit, Panginoon? When revival broke out, You've revealed to me she is to be my helper, one who will be by my side, but why? Why did You take her now?
Was I making things up in my head? Was I receiving a word from the enemy, instead? Or ... did You change Your mind?
Napatungo ako, releasing a long breath as I gazed down. Does my pain please You, God? Does my suffering give You joy? Why? Why must it happen like this? Did You bring her in my life, just so You can break me when You take her away?
BINABASA MO ANG
𝑁𝑜 𝑇𝑢𝑟𝑛𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝐵𝑎𝑐𝑘
Spiritual||Written in Filipino - English|| COMPLETED || She loves God. He hates the very mention of His Name. She is anointed by God's Spirit. He plays with demons. She is God's. He is lost. A woman of light comes to cross the life of a man whose life can...