Fake It...Easy, Right? [DISCONTINUED]

TWO

YOONGI POV

I woke up, once again though J assumed it was the next day. I realized it wasn't yet I was in my room.
^How did I get back here?^
As if on cue my bedroom door opened, a worried Jin smiling at him.

"How are you feeling?" His thoughts chimed in for the first time in a while near other people. I need help. I'm terrible. He cleared his thought and hummed with a tiny smile.

"Good. I feel better." Lies. All lies, help me please. I'm hurting. Jin nodded and sat by me.

"Anything bothering you?" I shook my head. Jin nodded once more.
"Just want to make sure...maybe you overworked yourself or something. You've ben eating and sleeping well right?" I just nodded with a smile. Jin sighed and got up.
"Okay, supper will be ready in a little while. I'll have someone come get you." I nodded and said 'okay'. Jin left and shut the door, when he did I ran to the bathroom in my room and locked the door. I stared at myself in the mirror, shaking as hot tears were pouring from my eyes. I'm tearing apart. Someone, anyone, please...help me. Notice I'm not okay. Please...
Yet, nothing answered my thoughts so I crouched and silently sobbed, my body wracked with each silent but rough sob.

After 10 minutes passed, I looked like my "old self" even though my eyes were slightly puffed and red. I shook it off and went to the kitchen, sitting down with a gummy smile. The members looked uneasy, I questioned it but said nothing. Dinner was silent, unusually. As soon as I finished, I thanked Jin and walked to my room, getting on my phone. I scrolled through Twitter and the words took affect of me. I finally had rnough, I needed to feel better.

As crazy as I sound, I liked the feeling of pain and sight of the different shades of red rolling down my arm and onto the bathroom tiled floor as the blood thickened and thinned. I was in here for about thirty minutes, my original and bathroom door were locked. I made quite a few cuts, a couple deep and anyone but me would say his skin looked like it was pulling itself apart with how deep it was. The blood was flowing and had made a puddle on the floor by my feet.

I was dazed, by not only my feelings and sight but also how much blood I didn't realize I lost. I quickly cleaned up, throwing the bloody napkins away and covering them. I washed my blade and walked out of the bathroom, previously had wrapped my arm up in (whatever the medical wrap is called...wrap?) I walked to my bed and laid down, sleep overtaking my vision.

It was the next day, finally. I noticed I hadn't gone to supper last night, well Jin hyung will probably get onto me. I got up and changed into ripped black jeans and an orange long sleeved shirt. Walking out, to the kitchen I saw nobody was there. It was seven in the morning so by now Jin would be cooking and all of the others would be running around, I was confused but shrugged it off. Going to the fridge and downing a bottle of cold water, throwing the bottle away and looking up, meeting Hoseok's eyes.

"H-" I started but he immediately cut me off by shaking his head and taking my hand, dragging me to the living room. I saw all of the members with many expressions held on their faces. I gummy smiled though.

"What's going on?" I gave a second glance at each before Jimin looked at me.

"Yoongi, we need to talk to you. And this is serious." I nodded and sat down, not liking the quiet and slightly awkward environment.

Namjoon let out a shaky breath a couple members from me, looking at me

"Yoongi, what is this?" He put a hand out, showing my blade I used last night. My breath caught in my throat but I didn't show it. I shook my head, held my smile, and spoke.

"I dunno, why do you have that?"
Namjoon gave me a look and shook his head.

"This was in your room, Yoongi. In your bathroom." Shit. I forgot to put it up. Why did they go in there anyway?

"Um, sorry but I don't keep that kinda stuff in there." By now my smile was less but still very 'convincing'. Taehyung knelt in front of me, visibly trying not to cry.

"Yoongi, can you pull your sleeves up, please?" I tilted my head a bit and brought my arms to my body, crossing them.

"I don't see why I'd have to do that. Me and that have nothing to do with each other." I mentioned the blade, well my blade. Taehyung looked at me, a hard but soft expression lay there.

"Yoongi, do it." Namjoon spoke again, his voice was strict but I still didn't give in. I wouldn't on this subject.

"It's my privacy, even though nothing is wrong I still feel I shouldn't if I don't want to." I gave a look to Namjoon. He sighed and threw the blade on the table, standing and walking to sit by me. He took a few moments of silence then looked uo at me, tears falling from his eyes.

"Yoongi, you're one of my best friends. I don't want you hurting like this, please...just. Just show us so we can confirm that you have or haven't...harmed, yourself." I was shocked to see him crying, as I took his words in I still wasn't going to let them see.

I stood and huffed, my smile gone replaced with frustration.
"I'm not doing something I don't feel I need to." I started walking off and was about to go to the front door so I could get my shoes on, but was pulled back. Jungkook had gotten to his feet as well and held my hand. He made quick movements and gripped my sleeve cuff, but I was quicker and yanked my arm away. I turned and Jin was in front of the door. He gave me that one look that always got me wondering if he was okay sometimes but also made me want to cry out to him other times. I was caught off guard by Jin and he, with swift movements, grabbed my arm and pulled the sleeve up. I had the wrap on from earlier, trying to get him not to remove it but he did. Gasps and choked sobs sounded.

My eyes widened, my cuts exposed. Shit, shit, shit. I pulled my arm away, refusing to let them think that I cut. Comig up with the worst excuse but most general one ever.

"It was the cats. Uh- street cats. The street cats. They're vicious." I dryly chuckled. Jin looked at me with sympathy. He shook his head and hugged me. By that point I couldn't hold it in and sobbed out, crying onto my only hyungs shoulder.

(A/N) ello.

Word Count: 1199