50 Shades Of Felix

The Mystery Mobile and the Journey to Lake Tarawera

'Come now, my child." Steve Harvey beckoned Felix, 'We can still reach the other two. Now where did he say the second one-"

"THERE THEY ARE! AFTER HIM!11!!!!!!1"

Without even thinking, Felix leaped off his crusty bare foot and bolted to the far away light that he could see, far, far, in the distance as he heard the fat and pounding footsteps of Shrek, and alongside him Brian Diver.

His heart was pounding as fast as he ran, a sickening scream sat of the edge of his tongue as the humid air spat in his face.

Steve Harvey was fast as the speed of light, and petrified Felix was swooped up by his hips up into the tree trunks. From above, Steve Harvey and Felix skipped each branch, but instead flew above the top of the green trees, above the thousands of beautiful view of the dead bodies and up where the oxygen was thin and clouds were blooming.

Just out of the corner of his squinted eye, he could see shrek and brian stop where they were, hands on their knees and chests puffing in. He sat in Steve Harvey's cradling arms as they rapidly yet calmly shot into the blue, bright sky.

The dildo shaped bottle sat in Felix's yellow hands, every vein pumping with sickening adrenaline. Deep in thoughts of victory, he suddenly noticed how quiet and calm it was in the cotton-like clouds.

"Steve? How come it's so quiet? Where are we going?"

"Aaa now my child, you ask too many questions. Just you wait. I know something that you can aquire to help you on this journey. "

The two new friends bolted higher and higher into the clouds, yet questions still sat on the edge of his tongue. Again deep in thoughts, that were interrupted by the ever growing sound of Church Songs and n word Voices, he stopped his train of thought. He seemed to be feeling drowsy, though the saturated sun and reflection of the light creamy clouds shone on his crusty face. His head and limbs were heavy just like his tanned eyelids, and they slowly shut.

'aaaa , pastor charles!" was the last thing his numb ears could hear before the world closed off.

Felix awoke to see a heavenly figure entering the room holding a red cushion with some type of medication resting on it.

"Charles! He's awake!" Steve Harvey yelled. Steve was standing next to Felix's bedside, holding his pale hand.

As soon as the first breath since waking up escaped his plump lips, a cold metal was closed around his neck by small hands to his right.

"w-what" Felix mumbled, his eyes opening slowly and his hands stroked a warm oxygen mask around his face and lifting the elastic string around his face. A sweet faced man smiled down at him.

"Good evening, Sir Pewdiepie."

"Who- are you?"

"My name is Pastor Charles. I am a demigod of this floaty cloud kingdom."

"Do- do you have godly powers?" Felix wanted to know this, as he would stop at nothing to defeat King Edgar once and for all.

"I do not have powers, but I do have an enchanted locket." The sweet faced man gestered down to the chain hanging around Felix's neck. "That was once my own. It allowed me to grow wings and a merman tail, and transform between the angel, mermaid and human forms I was blessed with. And now you shall have those powers."

"But what will you do? You have no purpose now without your locket!" Steve Harvey exclaimed, as he was well educated in the field of angels and mermaids. Pastor Charles turned to face Steve.

"All I have to do is step over the edge of the cloud kingdom, and that will be it for me. I have completed everything I need to."

Pastor Charles got up from kneeling next to Felix's hospital bed and walked towards the door to go outside.

"Charles no! Don't jump!" Felix rushed up from his bed to try and save Charles, but he was too late. Pastor Charles was smiling sweetly as he always did. Slowly falling backwards, Charles closed his eyes before his feet left the cloud.

Felix was determined to save his savior, so Felix dove over the edge of the cloud after him. Pastor Charles was out of sight. His only remains were dust floating away in the wind. Once again, Felix was too late.

"Felix, you will fall into Lake Tarawera! Grow a mermaid tail so you can swim and breathe, or else you will die!" Steve Harvey yelled from above.

Picturing his mermaid tail in mind, Felix used all of his energy, and in one frightening move, he shouted, "NANI," right before he graciously hit the soothing but terrifying waters of Lake Tarawera.