Carlisle and Esme Cullen how it begon

The first night

I do not own the characters they belonge to Stephenie Myer. I will never claim that the characters are mine. This is an addaption I made to give my insight of how the relationship of Carlisle and Esme begon. Copyrighted by Stephenie Myer.

It had been hour when I jumped of that cliff. I still had my eyes closed but could hear a voice softly apologizing. What was he apologizing for I thought, was I dead, I probably was I jumped off a cliff in a storm I thought by myself. I opened my eyes slowly. The room was dark but I could see everything so clearly. Every fiber and little detail. Then I spotted a person sitting next to me on a chair holding my hand. He looked at me with a mix of emotions on his face, I could see worry, shame, a little bit of fear and relief. He had stopped whispering when I had opened my eyes. Where am I was the first thing that came to my mind and at the same moment I heard a strange high voice asking it, it took me a while until I realized that it was my own voice. The man must have seen the confused expression on my face as a little smile moved the corner of his mouth. Am I dead, is this heaven. No you’re not dead he spoke with a light voice I have changed you. Changed I asked what do you mean I wanted to sit up and before I had finished the thought in my head I was already sitting. I need to begin by the beginning he started. I now looked curiously looked at his beautiful face, he had light blond hair and these amazing amber colored eyes. I found you when you’re where wheeled into the morgue, you were so beaten up and bloody that they hadn’t even looked for a pulse, but I heard it and decided I couldn’t let you die he sighed. I took you to my home and I bit you his fingers lifted of my hand and he gently stroked over the mark that now was placed on my neck. What does that mean I asked trying to get everything in order in my head but I couldn’t it was like my mind went all over the place. You are now a vampire he said not meeting my eye but staring at his hands resting in his lap. I am a what I stuttered that can’t be and before I knew it I was across the room. How did I? You are a vampire now he explained you are much faster and stronger than a human would ever be. My name is he started but time I cut off his sentence I know who you are I blurted out you are the doctor who treated me for a broken leg ten years ago. He looked bewildered by this statement you remember he asked. Of course I remember, it is hard to forget a face like yours and I quickly hid my face a bit ashamed of what I just had said you are Dr Cullen. Carlisle he said when he slowly rose to his feet I indeed treated you for a broken leg all those years ago. He came closer why do you still remember me he asked with slight amusement or was it pride. Ever since you treated me your face came wondering in my dreams, I always wondered what had become of you, if your where happy with you wife and children again I turned away with embarrassment apparently everything that popped in my head I said out loud sorry I am not really in control of my mind and speech right now. He looked up at me with a look of understanding I know he said it’s because you are a newborn you senses are multiplied by hundreds and it is overwhelming, you will get used to all of it but you will have to learn how to control yourself. I looked into his beautiful eyes. Now it is time to address another problem tough and he took my hand you probably need to hunt, you need blood. This was the first time I felt the burning sensation in my throat and without realizing it my hand grabbed one of the doorposts, immediately I heard a crunching noise and felt the splinters of the wood sliding across my fingers. I looked at it with bewilderment. You will have to get used to your new strength it will probably take some time and you will break more than you would wish but it will happen he said he calmly took my hand and pried my fist open until the remainder of the wooden frame fell to the floor. It was the first time I had looked around me in the room, all I had seen was the beautiful Carlisle sitting beside the bed I had laid on. The details were amazing I could see every fiber of the room every little crack or particle. The room was nicely furnished. A bed stood in the middle of the room and a closed stood beside it filled with clothes. In the back against a window that looked out over the woods behind the house stood a red couch with a table in front of it. Carlisle had stood silently beside me when I had taken in the room looking with slight amazement at my face but then he gingerly pulled my hand making me focus back in him again. You will need to hunt he said softly. Again I felt the burning in the back of my throat and I realized he was right. I followed him through the house apparently there were three floors, we walked down a flight of stairs into a hall though the front door. Out in the forest surrounding the house Carlisle started running with a tuck on my hand and I followed. We were going faster than I could have possibly imaged. We flew across threes, bushes over a river until we stopped. I wanted to keep running it was a wonderful feeling of freedom. But Carlisle made me focus again. Focus Esme he said it was the first time he had spoken my name and I was surprised he still remembered it in fact I forgot the burning sensation in my throat as I looked up at him how do you still remember my name? He looked surprised I rarely forget things he answered I sometimes thought of you he said how you were doing, what happened to you.  You did I said I was bewildered how could the man who had been in my dreams all these years be the one who had saved my life. Why did you actually safe me I looked up again he looked puzzled. I couldn’t let you die he answered truthfully with a flash of regret on his face. Do you regret it I instantly asked walking away looking around me, we were standing underneath a big pine three in the shade it must be in the afternoon judging by the sun, I keep seeing a sort of regret in your eyes. I heard him sight it’s not that I regret saving your life he said but I hate doing what I did to you, I took away your life of better said your death. You saved my life I stated so why should I resent you for it again I looked into his eyes and even from a slight distance I had to remember not to let myself drown in them. I made you a vampire he said you will stay like this for ever, you can’t contact your family and you will have to live in the darkness it is a curse in many ways. I have said goodbye to my family long ago I said and I felt a burning sensation in my stomach that had nothing to do with the burning in my throat, like my body wanted to cry but couldn’t. he walked over to me and took my hand again Esme I must wonder how are you keeping your senses so under control. What do you mean I asked we were running an it felt so good I actually wanted to keep going but you stopped and I got curious when you remembered me is that wrong I asked looking worried there must be something wrong with me I thought even when I am no longer human it was Carlisle hand that got me back in the present he chuckled. There is nothing wrong with you I am just amazed by your control, normally when a new vampire is created their emotions and behavior is all over the place they are driven by their longing for blood, but here you are standing beside me when a group of deer is walking a couple of miles to the west he said with amazement in his voice I just never met a newborn with such control he gave a pinch in my hand. I still looked a bit puzzled but now the thirst was becoming worse now I noticed fresh blood so near me, I swallowed but it didn’t help. He nodded understandingly and we took off again. When we came closer I released Carlisle’s hand I heart the pulsating of a heart it was close, my strides were getting longer but I was as silent, after a minute a pounced and felt a pair of antlers rip the dress that I was wearing but I didn’t care I didn’t take me much strength to take down the deer and my hands went through the fur and then I felt what I was looking for the pulsing of a heart and without hesitation I sank my teeth into its neck. Immediately a felt the burning subside as the blood went through my throat. It felt wonderful but as soon as I had killed the deer it was quickly out of blood but now I noticed Carlisle standing not far away from me with another deer in his hands. Here he said it didn’t take long before I drained my second deer. Now I came to my senses again and looked at my hands, my skin color was lighter than it had been, even now it was covered in blood. I crossed my legs underneath my body and looked up to Carlisle how did I just do that I am not that strong I said. Yes you are he nodded while he tossed the deer into a hole he had just dug. I stood up and looked at him his clothes were still unscathed while mine were hanging loosely of my body exposing more than I had realized but for a stupid reason it didn’t care anymore I didn’t have to be decent the only two people standing in the clearing were Carlisle and me. The cold didn’t bother me either I felt the wind blow across my arms but it was like the temperature didn’t affect me anymore. You won’t be cold anymore Carlisle answered my unspoken question as I had rubbed my hand over my now cold skin as if I wanted to warm myself our kind is hardly affected by anything he had closed the hole and slowly walked over to me and handed the sweater he was wearing here you have ripped your dress, careful though with your strength you may rip it. I carefully took it and pulled it over my head as if it was made of the thinnest fabric. I managed to pull it over my head with making just one hole in the fabric. And when I met Carlisle eye again he had the same look of amazement on his face as before you already have so much control over yourself he murmured. I smiled pleased of hearing the approval in his voice. He stretched his hand out to help me up and I took it without hesitation. We should be going back to the house if you want you want to clean up though he said looking over the torn pieces of clothing that were laying across the clearing we stood in. I shrugged it off, I rather hear more about your live if that is ok with you I said not meeting his eyes when we started to move again this time walking. He nodded what is it what you wanted to know he said while we turned left walking down a little stream running across the forest. Where were you born I asked. London I lived there with my father a pastor, my mother died during childbirth. I squeezed his hand with compassion, he went on, my father was sort of a witch hunter and I was his only son, I helped him but he was an impulsive man seeing ghosts everywhere his eyes lost in time seeing things I couldn’t see. He expected me to help him, but when I didn’t see the things he saw he got angry with me. But after a while I found a group of vampires that were living in the sewers and I took a mob to destroy them at night trying to draw them out, they were probably hungry so the scent of the blood alone was enough to draw them out and one bit me but he didn’t kill me. Knowing that my father would kill everything that the vampires had touched I crawled into a shed and lay there for three days in complete silence he tensed up a bit and trying to help him calm again I rubbed my thumb across his hand he went on and I listened in awe. I quickly realized what I had become and tried to kill myself a small smile came over his face of course I didn’t succeed at this, I decided I would starve myself so I went into the forest away from possible humans, but after weeks of not having blood my will started to faint and then I came across a herd of deer and before I knew what I was doing a was drinking the blood of the animal closed to me, and my strength came back he smiled again and I knew there was another way of living without being a monster he finished a story. Carlisle you can never be a monster I said stopping in my tracks and pulled his hand so he would face me. He was surprised with my statement but looked pleased. How old are you actually I asked it sounds like you have travelled the world for a long time. He nodded I have I have been born in 1640 and was changed in 1663. I quickly counted the years in my head, in my human life, math hadn’t been something I was really could at. But it seemed my vampire mind had no problem with it at all as I said 265 with a smile on my face. He nodded again. You never went back to your father I asked curiously while looking into his eyes. I looked at him from a distance a few times but never contacted him he answered truthfully. Must have been hard I exclaimed never having said goodbye. He sighted my father and I were never really eye to eye and since I had no extended family it wasn’t very hard to move on with my new life he shrugged but Esme there is one question I like to ask you and his eyes changed a little, how is it that the young vibrant girl I met in the ER ten years ago come to commit suicide? I momentarily closed my eyes and when he saw the expression on my face he immediately said if you don’t want to answer it I don’t have to know. But for some reason I needed him to know so with some effort I forced myself to meet his eyes which had filled with sorrow. I started walking again but kept one of Carlisle’s hand in a tight grip I would need the support but couldn’t tell my story when looking him in the eyes. Right after my leg was healed my parents wanted me to marry I started and when they introduced Charles the son of a banker he seemed a good fit for them, I didn’t want to marry him I could talk to him at first but I realized we would never be anything more than friends I kicked a stone out of my way and was a bit surprised when it damaged a large three but kept my mind on the story I was telling. But to make my parents happy I would agree to marry him, maybe I would feel more for him later on if we were married. But Charles changed when we got married, he loved me I sighted but when he realized I could never love him back like he wanted me too he started to be aggressive with me. On our wedding day he was the perfect gentleman in front of all the people but that night was the first time he forced himself on me I  felt the strange burning sensation again in my chest but kept going, he started doing it again and again violating me in every way there was I stuttered raising my hand when Carlisle wanted to say something, my parents and family didn’t want to hear any of it so I started excepting that this would be my life from now on, but then he went in the army and got sent away I was so relieved I sighted when the memory rushed back to me this time it were my eyes that wondered to the past but my feet kept going forwards and Carlisle followed without hesitation understanding it was easier for me.