Diana. (Book 1)A One Direction fan fiction.

Chapter 12 - I've Tried.

"I'm gonna go outside for a second." I tell Cher. I quietly grab Zayn's pack of cigarettes and his lighter that I took when we were visiting his family and I he's out back. I sit on a chair and I bend my knees, wrapping my arm around them. I light a cigarette and put it in my mouth before placing the pack back in my pocket along with the lighter. It's been two days since my birthday. I got Zayn's present, it rests upon my wrist, I know I shouldn't even be thinking about Zayn but I can't help it when my mind wanders to him. I hear the back door open and I go to drop the cigarette but a voice stops me.

"You really shouldn't smoke." Zayn tells me.

"I'm 18, what can you actually do about it?" I ask.

"I can take back my own cigarettes and my lighter." He says.

"Your underage though." I reply.

"And you were underage when you got a tattoo." He retorts.

"I also got those for meaning, now I'm gonna go to bed." I crush the cigarette and go to head back upstairs until Zayn catches my arm.

"The couch is pretty comfortable after midnight." He tells me. He lets my arm go and I head upstairs deciding if I should go see him after midnight.

"What's got you in such a happy mood?" Cher asks curiously.

"I think I'm gonna go meet someone later." I reply quietly before laying down on my bed and I grab my Mac. I turn it on and open up my Facebook. I go through my newsfeed and find posts that are about Riley and Lucas. They're not posts about being sorry for everyone who knew Riley and Lucas, they're memories they have shared with them. Happy memories.

"We have the live show tomorrow." Cher tells me. We sing on Wednesday which is tomorrow along with the rest of the contestants because including me and Cher there are only six left. I made it halfway.

"What song are you doing?" I ask, in that moment I zone out. I can't remember who I am or where I am.

"Diana!" I finally snap out of it when u feel Cher shaking me.

"Huh?" I ask and she sits back down on her bed.

"I ask what song you're doing." She tells me.

"Oh, Someone Like You by Adele." I tell her. "What time is it?"

"12:24." She replies. I zoned out for an hour?

"I'm gonna go get some water. You should get some sleep." I tell her and walk downstairs, instead of going into the kitchen I stand in the doorway of the living room where Zayn is sitting on the couch. "It's more comfortable after midnight, huh?"

"Come see for yourself." He tells me and pats the spot beside him.

"I'm not just gonna act like nothing happened." I tell him.

"You're the one who told me not to stop trying." He says quietly.

"And I was also the one who told you to stay the hell away from me." I reply and I hear him chuckle slightly.

"Yeah, you were." He says and places his elbows on his knees, clasping his hands together. "The live show is tomorrow."

"Yeah." I agree quietly.

"And then next week we're doing duets." He says.

"Yeah, umm Cheryl wants me to sing with Colbie Caillat." I tell Zayn.

"What song?" He asks.

"I'm not sure. I find out if in two days if I make it that far." I say. I sit on the far away from Zayn on the couch and cross my legs. "Some nights I wonder where I'll be in five years, and other nights I wonder if I'll make it that far."