Decision

1

Major tw, especially for this chapter. Both have mentions of self harm. Both have mentions of accidental suicide. Be cautious if these bother you, or just don't read.

Seonghwa was that broken kid. Ya know, the one that cried for seemingly no reason? Was always hurt in some way. New bruises, maybe a burn or more? A few supposed cat scratches? Hell even he didn't know why he cried at this point. Nothing was wrong. He was just sad. He was hurting so fucking much. He had friends, a loving family, wasn't bullied.

Yeah, sure he's had depressive episodes. He didn't know why or where his depression even came from, but he knew for a fact he had it. He didn't cry with bleeding arms alone at ungodly hours of the night because he was sad over a show or a song. He didn't heat up the bottom of a spoon just to press it to his arms for nothing. He didn't bruise his legs because he was bored.

He just didn't know. He didn't know at this point. Didn't know why he was how he was. Didn't know what caused it.

He did have one joy in life though. Kim Hongjoong. The boy was cute and smiled at him, even waved sometimes. They never talked. They never bothered to.

Seonghwa had been in the bathroom, his arm entirely numb and bleeding. He had stopped crying and the blade he had in his hand had fallen by now. He was frozen and for the first time in this depressive episode of his, he was terrified. Not terrified of bleeding out. Terrified because someone caught him. Hongjoong had came in and saw him starting to clean his wounds. Neither had spoken. They just stood there. Hongjoong turned on his foot and rushed out and Seonghwa only became more and more fearful. He cleaned his arm as quick as he could an wrapped in back up in the ace bandage he ready had around healing ones as well as putting the razor back in his wallet. He pulled his sleeve down and walked out as though nothing happened. He went to class and acted as normal despite Hongjoong sitting just a few seats away.

After that day Hongjoong stopped smiling at him. Stopped greeting him. If anything he kept giving the Seonghwa a look of pity, as if trying to tell him he could vent to him if needed. Seonghwa never did though. He was terrified of being judged and how was he going to explain his depression? He seemingly had no valid reason to be depressed. Why bother trying to explain that he was depressed when nothing bad happened to make him like this.

So here he was. Sobbing quietly ad he made more and more cuts on his arm, even going over some to make them worse. He had cleaned them and even wrapped them up before going to bed. He wasn't sure why it happened. He didn't think he made too many or made them horribly bad. But according to his body, he'd had enough.

That's right. Park Seonghwa passed away in his sleep. Why exactly? What he did of course. He went to far down with a few and lost too much blood.