happiness is a curious thing
that
i often find myself
trying to define
when we eat
something delicious
and umami overflows
to spill against our tastebuds
with a dash of hope --
of realization --
that maybe the world isn't
so hopeless after all
when we walk
with someone we love
hand-in-hand,
talking about our
daily happenings
our struggles
and worries
and we laugh
at the demons that prevent
what we perceive as
joy
when there is rain
that hits the ground
with the soft pitter-patter
of tiny feet
and trickles down
your cheeks and nose
as your raise your head
and let the sky's
blessings fall
onto your skin
after i cry
and brackish tears
have already dripped down
the sides of my face
onto my calloused palms
as i cup my eyes
and wish that
someday
life could have meaning again
after i see my own reflection
and curse at myself
at my puffy red eyes
at my quivering lip and
trembling limbs
at the marks my nails
leave in my hands
and
at the picture of you
i can't seem to get out of my head.
is this happiness
does the moment in which
everything else passes make
the world
jubilantly alright
i have yet to discover my truth
