Broken Beyond Repair

Chapter IX: Unhappy Endings

It can't be!

Damien got on the bus. But he was unconscious.

I kept looking back at the man to see if it was really him. He was getting closer. Closer. Was he going to sit by me! My breathing faltered as the man sat down behind me.

I needed to know if it was him. I turned back to look, and the man caught me staring at him. It wasn't Damien. I let out a sigh. By the time Damien actually woke up, I would be long gone.

~New perspective~

Sophia's bus continued down the road, leaving behind the small house on the corner. No one knew who lived there. Neighbors only ever saw a man coming and going from the house, but they never met him.

No one would know anything was wrong for no one cared about a stranger. There lying in the midst of a forgotten battle field laid Damien.

His head had started to bleed again, soaking the carpet. His breathing was shallow. . but there. His eyelids fluttered open as he tried to regain consciousness

The room was scattered with broken glass and a fire extinguisher. Deeper into the house. Chairs were thrown about and objects lying astray. There on the kitchen floor lain a peculiar sheet of paper.

~Perspective ends~

The bus ride was nonchalant, and boring. I had calmed my nerves for the most part as we headed closer to the one person I loved.

Except maybe Damien. Some part of me still clung to him. The times when he was kind and sweet hearted. A tear fell down my cheek. I shouldn't feel sympathy for an awful man, but I do. I guess that makes me a bad person too. Ha I'm just overthinking things.

I gazed out the window, trying to clear my mind. The view was so mesmerizing since I haven't left that house. My mind became clear, and I dozed off. Free from the cares of my life. Time moved slower as I became lost in a daze.

I had so many questions. How was Jessie doing? Did she even care about me? Is Damien really dead?

~Damien's Perspective~

My vision was blurry, and my whole body ached. I could see shards of glass lying on the floor. I attempted to reach out, but my arm was too heavy. Each time I tried to move it was nothing but futile. What had happened?

I mustered up the strength to sit up. It took every fiber of my body to do it, but I did. I leaned against the bed side and stared at the disheveled room.

I couldn't believe after almost being killed by Sophia, I still longed for her. But she's gone now. It's probably for the best. Tears welled up to the surface. It's true I do care for her immensely. I thought she felt the same. . . I could never do it though. Be a good person without this sickening mind of mine.

I sat there for a long time. Just thinking.

I wanted to get up and never rest till I found Sophia. She kept me sane, for the most part. But. I also felt great sadness. She had chosen to leave me. Sophia might have found satisfaction when she thought she killed me.

I just wanted to die, but the part of me that held onto Sophia, clinged to life. I had to see her just once more. Tell her how I felt even though I messed up, and she'd never love me. I just need closure.

I sat there for what seemed like forever until thirst got the better of me. I feebly got up. I had to use whatever I could to stabilize myself.

Stumbling around the house, I was greeted with the mess I had made while under the influence of my anger. Objects were thrown from their original places, and furniture was broken to pieces.

I was still in extensive pain, but I continued through the house.

I don't even know what had come over me. What drove me to cause all this madness? I leaned on the kitchen counter. A mere few hours ago. I almost killed Sophia. Right there, in that exact spot.

Even if I ever did find Sophia, I could never come back to this place. I finally let my mind get the better of me. I mean this house was a gift from James.

Not like it's anything special, just a crappy place he gave me as a favor. I didn't want to be in a house that that bastard had anything to do with.

I could just live off the streets? I could manage somehow, but then I may never find Sophia. I told myself over and over again. "Sophia's my top priority. She's the only thing that matters."

I couldn't forget this. I just couldn't.

I had been sitting there for a while when a little something caught my eye. A small piece of paper laid on the floor. Out of everything thrown around this house, an insignificant piece of paper stood out to me.

Against my better judgement, I used the rest of my strength to get up and see what it was. I brought the small object into my hands. The paper was slightly crumpled from earlier. There was something writing on it.

It read as follows:

Dear Damien,

              I haven't known you for long, and I never would have met you if my friend hadn't dragged me to that awful party. But somewhere inside of me I guess I do care for you. I'm actually in your kitchen right now eating food. You should be in your bedroom healing up. And I don't even know why I'm writing this. But to the point even though you kidnapped me, I can't seem to hate you. Maybe telling you this may help me understand my feelings better (cause that would make life a whole bunch easier). I would say something like I hope I see you again, but I don't know how I'd feel about that. Whatever you're going through, your motive for taking me. I hope it gets resolved and that you'll be ok without me.

                                                                                                                                                      Love So-

The letter had been tear stained as if Sophia was crying when writing it. Couldn't she ever even love someone like me? Soph probably felt very different now that I went crazy and attacked her. There's no chance.

I noticed she hadn't finished the closing of the letter. That must have been when I woke up. It somehow felt incomplete. I was the cause of her not finishing the letter meant for me. Great.

At least she wrote one, and I found it after she's long gone. It's for the best, but that doesn't mean I love her any less.

Sophia. Whatever happens to me. I will find you before I die or take my own life, for my life will not be complete until I see you again.

I Love you Sophia warren.

~Perspective Ends~

The bus halted at the stop, and I got off. My ankle was still killing me, but I shook it off. There it was Jessie's house.

The house seemed almost creepy with the awful weather. Grey clouds covered the skies while it spit rain. I limped over to the door way. She might have not even gave me a second thought.

I knocked on the door. Nothing I knocked again, harsher this time. Finally an unorganized Jessie opened the door.

I was thrilled to see her. "Jessie!" I called out in happiness. Her voice was groggy as If she'd been sleeping for hours, "Sophia? What's up are you here to return that dress you borrowed?"

The dress. So she really hadn't noticed I was missing. Fuck. I laughed as tears came to my eyes. I guess I don't have anyone that cares about me. Except. . . no I can't think of him.

Sophia- So you really didn't notice?

Jessie looked at me confused then it changed to annoyance. With that she slammed the door in my face.

The one person I had left. Abandon once again. I guess you get used to the feeling. Shit, even learn to live with it. Maybe I shouldn't have left?