Ondreaz Lopez: Six Months with You

Pull through

Thirty-Ninth Chapter

Dear Diary,

Ondreaz was holding me as I cried. Then we both sat down on the bed. Ondreaz held my hands.
Ondreaz: Luna, I know what it feels like to feel hopeless or like nothing is going to work out. Trust me when I say it does. No matter what, you have to trust that I can handle it. I’m a grown man if I don’t want to do something I won’t. I want to be here for you. Let me please. I shook my head yes. 
Ondreaz: Okay? You make me feel beautiful, let me do the same. 
Luna: Okay.
Ondreaz: Okay. Come here my beautiful, intelligent and talented girlfriend. I love you so much. I lightly laugh as he pulls me on top of him hugging me tightly. I kiss him.
Luna: I love you too. He smiled then flipped us over. He looked at me in my eyes and he didn’t pity me. He didn’t feel bad for me. He genuinely wanted to help me because he loves me. I brace his face with my hands. A tear falls out of my eye. He wipes it away. 
Ondreaz: What?
Luna: Thank you for not letting go no matter how hard I tried to push you away. 
Ondreaz: You’re going to be okay. He got off of me and pulled me up a bit. 
Ondreaz: Have you ever had nightmares before?
Luna: Umm when I just got out of the centre. My brother had to sign the papers to pull me out. They stopped after a few days randomly. Sol and Xanai had to spend the nights with me. I was getting 5 hours at best a day. The moment I have been avoiding is coming up.

Ondreaz: Well maybe we can find different solutions like the first one, talk about it. So you are back at the facility? 
Luna: Yes and it was like everyone was dead when I was there you know? One of the workers would slip up and someone would get a hold of anything. One of them got to go outside for a visit home. She um… I started crying AGAIN.
Luna: Her name was Kyra. She got a belt and hung off of her fan. I was walking around and saw her. I screamed and cried but everyone just stared like there was nothing wrong. Like they just saw a body and not her. The nurses ran in but it was too late. That happened three times while I was there. Watching three people die it changes you. Having photographic memory makes it so much worse. 
Ondreaz: I can only imagine how rough that could’ve been. What do you think made you go back there in your dreams?
Luna: Ricky. He was like me not on an extreme level but he did overdose once on purpose. He fell in love with this girl who made his world spin. The way he described love was so beautiful but her mother was an abusive drunk who beat her to the point where she had fallen into a coma. One month later she woke but didn’t know who he was. Her father, a good man, took her away and he never saw her again. Everytime I think about Victoria I think of Ricky. 
Ondreaz: But she forgave you, things are good.
Luna: Yes but that guilt is what I can’t seem to shake. I don’t know, I just feel like such a terrible person. The internet freaking hates me right now, so that doesn’t help.
Ondreaz: Have you ever felt like we only see what our insecurities want us to see? I give him a confused look. 
Ondreaz: In my comments everyone is just telling me to give you a hug, make sure you’re okay and asking about you. They don’t hate you. Besides that the people who know you don’t hate you. Here is the issue. You seem like you have a tough time letting go. We can start by working on that. I can’t stand to see you crying or sad. You make me sad then Tony’s sad, then the sadness gets all over hype then spreads throughout LA soon America. I laugh.
Ondreaz: Only thing that can cure it is your laugh. What are you doing tonight?
Luna: Nothing why?
Ondreaz: Come out with Tony and I. We’re going to film with Tyga.
Luna: Okay what should I wear?
Ondreaz: You look great right now. He held my hand and kissed it. 
Ondreaz: We leave in about two hours.
Luna: I’m really tired. Let’s see how naps work? He shook his head. 

I laid down in the bed, getting under the covers and he sat next to me. I fell asleep shortly after. The dream came again but it was time to leave anyway. I wake up to Ondreaz slightly shaking me. I get up panicking 
For the first time I let him be there. I moved the cover and hugged him quickly. This dream was worse because this time I saw Victoria hanging. 
Ondreaz: Cariña, everything is okay. Relax and breathe.
Luna: Okay, what time is it?
Ondreaz: Five minutes until we head out. 
Luna: Okay that’s all the time I need. I quickly round myself up and we go. I feel like I say this so often but we really had fun. Tyga is such a chill, down to earth guy. The content we created was great. It was fun for him to show us around. Show us how things work. It was nice to just have a good time with such a legend like him. That night we got home but we know it’s not smooth sailings. So we call my brother. We’re both in my bed, ready for bed and extremely tired.
Sol: Hey it’s late there is it not? Hey Ondreaz.
Ondreaz: Hi Sol. We need to talk to you.
Luna: The nightmares are back and they’re not going away.
Sol: Seriously, I thought we got rid of those for good.
Luna: Wait there is a way? Please let us know.
Sol: Ondreaz you have to let her go through it. We tied you up so you wouldn’t hurt yourself and let you dream on. When you woke up it was like you didn’t remember what happened. All you said was Victoria forgive me. Then that was it.
Luna: Not sure about the ropes but we’ll think of something. 
Sol: Ondre while I have you we need to talk. 
Ondreaz: About?
Sol: Luna has a very low immune system. That’s why she goes to the hospital once every month and takes special vitamins. Her chances of surviving this virus is very low so please watch out because she won’t.
Ondreaz: I got you brother.
Sol: Okay going back into this meeting. Please pray for me. Deja que el fuego te guíe.
Ondreaz: Let the fire guide you.   
Luna: Let the fire guide you. We both laugh while I cut the call. 
Luna: Since when are you and Sol so close?
Ondreaz: You and Tony are close.
Luna: But we don’t try to babysit you. He shrugged.

Luna: It’s time to go to sleep, you ready for tonight?
Ondreaz: No maybe we should sleep in our room.
Luna: I don’t want to wake up Tony.
Ondreaz: You’re going to wake him up regardless. 
Luna: Okay let’s do this. I got up and put on a big hoodie because I only had on shorts and a sports bra.
Ondreaz: Ready? We walk over to their room. We explain everything to Tony.
Tony: Wow! So we have to hold you down? You can’t do any of those fighting moves in your sleep can you? I laugh.
Luna: No, Tony you’re fine. Let’s hurry and do this. We turn off the light and I lay my hand on Ondreaz’s face. 
Luna: You have to do this no matter what. I lean over.
Luna: You too Tony. Be brave guys. I kiss Ondreaz before snuggling up into him. I fall asleep, go through the dream and the weirdest thing happened. Wake up sweating with lights on. Tony and Ondreaz are red. Ondreaz has tears in his eyes. I don’t know what happened. When I first wake up I’m still a little hazed but when my vision focuses. I hug Ondreaz holding him.
Luna: It’s all over now. 
Ondreaz: Are you okay?
Luna: Yes I’m fine. 
Luna: Let’s go to my room okay? Ondreaz shook his head and walked out. I turn to Tony giving him a hug. 
Luna: What happened?
Tony: Damn you’re strong. You were fighting us.
Luna: What?
Tony: You were crying, shaking and just kicking. 
Luna: How was he?
Tony: He pulled through just like you did. You both did great.