keep the paper lantern lit

avatar state

day three of zutaraang week 2020! for this prompt i tried my hand at some angst (aangst, if you will). i really enjoyed writing this one, so i hope you enjoy!

~*~

avatar state: who dares to love forever (oh, when love must die?)

Waiting was the hardest part.

"He was supposed to be back five days ago!" Katara snapped, shoving past the Fire Nation guards to enter Zuko's personal study. "Five days! And we haven't heard anything from him!"

Aang had been called to the Earth Kingdom last week to help put down an uprising of hot-blooded Ozai supporters in one of the former Fire Nation colonies - of all places - and had been expected back before the weekend passed. It was a higher risk mission than usual, as some of the firebenders had supposedly convinced earthbenders to join their cause - as to how they'd done that, Katara didn't have a damn clue - but Aang had promised he could handle it without her and Zuko's help. Now it was five days beyond his promised return, and neither he nor anyone else had sent word about what had caused his delay. Lagging two or three days behind schedule wasn't necessarily unusual for Aang, what with him being the Avatar, but not having heard from him? And not having heard anything about him? And then taking into consideration how dangerous the mission had been labelled to be? Katara felt her anxiety was completely justified. And therefore so were her lack of appetite and the sleepless nights she'd been having.

Zuko sighed, scrawling his signature at the bottom of one of the many papers on his desk before placing his pen down and looking up at her. "I know. I dispatched people to the Earth Kingdom two days after his intended return date, and I'm expecting them to send news by messenger hawk that will arrive either tonight or tomorrow morning."

Katara had to resist the urge to tear her hair out, as that particular display of frustration would get her nowhere. Still, the pent-up stress and fear and guilt for not accompanying Aang when she could have - it demanded release. She slammed her palms down on Zuko's desk. "There has to be more you can do. You're the Fire Lord. Something! Anything more than just sitting here, for spirits' sake!"

Zuko dismissed the aide who Katara assumed had been helping him sort through and review his paperwork, waiting for the door to shut behind them before he addressed her again. "I know it's frustrating," he began, his tone even, "but all we can do right now is wait for news to arrive."

If Katara hadn't been a waterbender, she would have described her blood as being on fire. She supposed 'boiling' would have to do. "'Wait'?" she repeated, her voice far icier than the hot rage burning inside of her. "How can you possibly expect me to wait any longer?!" She'd waited five days already, and she couldn't stand the endless delays for even one more second. Her hand dropped to the flask ever-present on her hip. "No. You can't make me stay here. I'm going after him." Maybe it was futile, but she didn't care, at least looking for him was an action, at least she'd be doing something instead of sitting helpless -

"Katara, you are not leaving this palace," Zuko ordered, staring her down.

She met his gaze with a cold, steely one of her own. "You have no power over me, Fire Lord Zuko," she sneered, an ugly, irrational hatred curling through her veins. "In fact, as your esteemed guest, you should be helping me in any way possible rather than refusing to provide me assistance."

"And what, exactly, do you plan to do to help him, Katara?" Zuko said, standing and crossing his arms over his chest. She could tell he was trying not to lose his temper - Aang had once pointed out to her how Zuko tended to clench his jaw when he was frustrated, and she'd noticed it ever since. "We don't know where he is inside the colony, or if he's even in that area of the Earth Kingdom anymore!"