Your Lie That Night (Iwaoi)

part 6 ~ iwaizumi

We stayed in this position ~ oikawa resting his head on iwaizumi's chest ~ until the fireworks were over and then i asked

"So do you want to go out with me"

Silence descended once again upon us and oikawa started to cry again. I didnt understand why? Why was he being like this? Were those tears of joy? But his sobs felt somewhat painful. And then just as i was about to ask again, he stood up and looked at me for a second. His face all pale and his face relaxed.

"I'm a terrible person and i'm a liar." He yelled this and started to run. Before i could even understand anything i was chasing after him, yelling his name and telling him to stop but he was running away from me. I didnt like that. It felt as if i let him run away this time, i wont be able to ever be with him again. I cursed myself as soon as this thought appeared in my head. But then i saw it.

Oikawa suddenly just collapsed. I was gasping for air but i ran as fast as i could towards him. He had his hand on his mouth and he was crying silently, i patted his back and my eyes fell on his hand, streaks of blood were running down his hand and onto the moonlit grass. I pulled his hand to myself and saw his mouth was oozing blood more and more every second now.

I had no idea what was happening but i knew it wasn't good. I called both ambulance and his parents and waited with him. I didnt know what to do except to hold his hand. His blood all over om my hand as well, but i didnt mind that. It was his that state that made my heart crush. It wasnt going to be good.

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As i waited in the waiting room, i heard his parents yell at him. Something about missing his medication dose, something about him not be careful, something about him not being serious.
My shattered heart was shattering again and again, it hurts.
How long has this been going on for?
Why hadnt he told anything about it to me?
Why wasnt he trusting me?
Why was he not being serious?
Why is there a need to be serious?
Thoughts clouded my head and i needed answers.

An hour later i saw his parents come out and gesture me that i can see him. His mother's eyes were all red and puffy , his father's face looked  drained. Just looking at them was making me nervous. I didnt want to know the cause.

I pushed the heavy door of his room and i saw him laying on the bed, smiling.
God damn it. That fake smile.

"Sorry, iwa-chan i ruined our night like that" ruined?? Is that what he has to say? I wanted to tell him off or atleast flick him on his forehead but i couldn't. I just stood there, examining his fake expression.

"What is it?" I asked. I didnt want to know but i asked.

He frowned. Good, atleast that fake smile isnt there anymore.

"I didnt want to tell you iwa-chan, but i guess i have no choice" he sighed and looked away from me as he continued, "its cancer, blood cancer stage 4, no survival chance, expected death is one month away." He said it so nonchantly that i thought it was a joke.

I just stared at him. I felt like someone had just stabbed me in the heart, and is stabbing me again and again. It felt like concrete drying up in my chest. So hard to inhale anymore. A single tear rolled down my cheek. And i saw a painful expression appear on his face.

We stayed in silence, he didnt look at me much, it was just me and him. Just iwaizumi hajime and oikawa tooru. Just two childhood bestfriends. Just two lovers.

After what seemed like an eternity, he finally spoke,
"Im sorry" i didnt understand why? Why he said that? Its not his fault?

"Bullshit" i managed to speak. Why was i like that? Always so mean. But somehow that made him smile. A genuine smile. A smile that made my heart flutter, even after all that damage, my heart was beating for his love.