Lurks Within

Awakening

It's night time, pitch dark outside no stars quite visible probably due to pollution in the city. It's summer time so during the night it seems as if the whole place is burning like lava is being poured, but air conditioners come to the rescue.

But that was not happening in the case of Ivy, she was twisting and turning in bed and was sweating badly while the room was chilled. She looks to her side, her sister, mom and dad are in deep sleep. While here Ivy couldn't even think about sleeping, she looks at her sweaty palm with racing heart beat and with the cold environment it was so unsettling. She had a cutter blade in her right hand, a rusted one and was nearly blunt. "Never in my life I thought I would do this" she whispered to herself. "That constant nagging from parents and peers because of how my body looked and how thin I had become, that wasn't the only thing the way how my parents began with the blaming because I didn't chose subjects to study they wanted, because I knew I couldn't do that but I also didn't want to fail them, guess I did. I think at your vulnerable moment all sorts of thoughts come rushing through.

How my ex boyfriend was a total dick and broke up because I didn't send certain pictures he had asked for I mean how low can you get argh. But I loved you so much, you should have known. You know what they say about first love it hits hard. But mind you this was long time ago. And recent one was in college how my best friend kissed my crush because she was bored and the worst thing I got to know from others, I mean worst experience I had.
Be it school or college it was nightmare for me. I just wanted to get over with it. Not to mention sexual assault that happened at college and also when I was just 10 years old, yeah one of the relatives. Never spoke about that to anyone. Throughout both school and college I was this socially awkward but would make friends quickly and regret later.
The thought of me being useless and a burden came across again and again. I know that's not what it is, but I could not get of this feeling talking to friends help they say, but it takes time. I could not any longer and I decided to end it."

Tears fell down her pillow, she cried her heart out with pillow to her face, faint muffled cries could be heard across the room. After wiping with the pillow she looked to it thinking if anybody had saw her cry the most other than bathroom it was the pillow. She tried to cut but couldn't, of course that amount of courage she didn't have, it was so blunt that it barely made any marks just leaving little lines. And finally the first cut it happened, just a little bit blood and it wasn't even flowing but the amount of pain tremendous. She was breathing heavily and heart it felt as if it was at throat. She clutched her pillow tightly and tried to sleep, while her family members were having a sound sleep.

Next day it was a normal day, while taking the bath "ouch" she yelled, even though the cut was small accidentally having contact with water made it worse. Surprisingly today was quite a normal day, Ivy went to her room and was sketching her favourite thing to do but dad ain't a big fan of that, time waste it is he says. She had drawn a creature, out of the mysterious creatures which she likes. Acting like nothing ever happened. "Woah"!! she exclaims, "this is the best thing and like how good it turned out to be". Well she's into mythical creatures and is like really sure of their existence, well who isn't curious about that. "I would be a Winchester you know in finding creatures but won't hunt them like they do, finding creatures and saving things" she giggles while she scribbles her name beside the sketch of a monster which is an urban legend looks like a human with huge rough violet/red tentacle as a tongue and has power that of a siren which makes people drawn towards them. She posts the image to her Instagram page and to the mystery blog which she is into.
At night she sleeps with a heavy heart wondering how would I ever make things right in my life.