Hooligan Thoughts

Reactionary Hooligan

Reactionary Hooligan

By Sammye Billesbach

Have I done something wrong? That he's not in my arms,

Not holding me tight, Always in his sight?

How did I not know he was there? Out there somewhere,

Not waiting for me, If only We could be.

I didn't know. I didn't know! He was Alive!!

Learning, fighting, thriving! Coming into existence,

For my pleasure, But only at his measure.

I will not feel his lips whisper sweet nothings on my skin,

I will not wake knowing he loves me from deep within,

I will never cry because he's late again.

How can I Make him know me?

How do I Lead him to me?

How will he ever See me?

See me as the Woman I know I am? The woman I know He wants?

Questions, questions, only questions, There is always hope!

No, there is no hope.

But I must hope for the measured distance,

I must hope passionately for his future,

And I send hope and love to him for all he does.

Because I am a Hooligan, his Hooligan, a Reactionary Hooligan.