The Impossible Dream (A Death Note Fanfic)

Chapter one.

Soft rain dripped down the tall windows. The grey sky cast a dismal, vague glow over the city, omitting in its subtle highlights and yawning shadows off of the sharp angles of buildings. The people were slow. The air around seemed to weigh them down, as if they were trying to push their way through deep water.

All things somber and dull laced into that day seemed to capture themselves in him, startling any victim who may look on him.

Light wondered what cause Ryuzaki would have to appear so humbly melancholy.

A cause that L would be aware of, anyway.

L couldn’t possibly be conscious to the fact that Light planned to bring him to his death.

But as he stared out of a window into the fogged, dreary city, Kira’s conscience told him of an impossible possibility.

One in which L had somehow discovered the inevitability of his oncoming death.

The words Ryuzaki had spoken to him still resonated in Light’s mind.

“It’ll be lonely, won’t it? You and I will be parting ways soon.”

This statement clearly implied that Ryuzaki could possibly know.

But the detective’s strange behavior contradicted this assumption.

Why would Ryuzaki merely appear sad if he truly knew about Light’s plan? Wouldn’t he try to stop Light before it was too late?

But Ryuzaki showed no signs of wanting to expose Light as Kira; if he even knew that Light was in fact Kira.

Yagami decided that there was little chance that L knew about his plan. He didn’t want to believe that L knew. But this estimation still could not answer the question as to why Ryuzaki was so sad…

Against the better judgment as the god of the new world, Light took a few steps towards Ryuzaki, who was also fixing his eyes on the rain outside the window.

His reflection in the window mimicked his despondent expression. His black eyes were vacant, hiding carefully the mystery of the emotion which was undulating deeper inside, somewhere in which Light could not reach. His ebony hair hung long in his face, clashing gently with his porcelain skin. Light wondered what it would be like to get a closer look at those shadowy eyes, to carefully peel away the layers of Ryuzaki’s walls like petals from a rose. To sweep away the grey veil dividing Light from the truth behind his eyes, and to see what kinds of things grow there.

Light had a natural instinct to reach out to those in pain in this way. To shroud them in feigned comfort and empty words because he could manage no more than that. But now, looking at Ryuzaki, the silent wistful L whom was standing in his grave, Light hadn’t the heart to pretend.

He put a cautious hand on L’s shoulder, pushing his fingers gently into the soft texture of his shirt.

“Tell me what you’re thinking,” Light asked Ryuzaki. And to his own surprise, he really wanted to know.

A look in Ryuzaki’s eyes caught the light of the sky as they turned to look at the other man. But Light could not figure out what that look was.

Yagami saw himself reflected in L’s gaze. Normally, when Light saw himself, he saw a strong, intelligent god, on his way to ruling the world. But when he saw himself while looking at Ryuzaki, all of the good and righteousness about Kira was gone. And in Light’s reflection, there was only darkness.

“The bells,” Ryuzaki murmured in his quiet, low voice. “They’re quieter when you’re here.”

L glanced back at the rain.