Aexi is a heartless girl out of this Earth expressing her feelings toward someone very especial before it gets too late and other intergalactic people seize her worth. To her, "Love do exist even to the most naive ones of this universe!"
⭐It's all a...
■ So all your life you knew Humans only have heart that are able to love! Then LOL to the new things you will learn here that are going to tear all your believes into pieces. But before that, read this one to continue farther:
▪ "Some day... Someday I'll wake up in a winter morning and find you beside me; The golden ray would reflect on your eyes; And I'll be happy cause I'm still alive.
Someday... Someday I would hold your hand walking over the road- You would look at me as if no-one else existed; And I'd be happy that I've another breath.
May be someday... On a sunny summer eve Playing beach ball under the dazzling sun- You would throw me the ball that you always throw to your buddies; I will be happy that I can get a bit of you!
Someday... May be someday After achieving all the goals of your life- You would give me a call while I am sad; And I will also become happy for you.
Or Someday... Someday in a winter morning while the golden ray reflects on the very ground- When I won't be able to see you smile, You'd know I existed for you and I believed that once you told me- Someday when you would be rich you'd buy me expensive gifts; while 'I just waited for another day with you'. " ▪
■ Here, in Earth you people say ladies rarely write for men. But there is exception in human and us too. Yes I write poems thinking of him and only for him like the one above. Does he knows that? Nope, not yet. Do I plan to tell him? That's another discussion. So what do I do? Sometimes, I wrote down the random thoughts that I would like to tell him. Like this one I wrote two solar years ago:
"Do I think about you? Even that has been a thinking issue.. You have been like a part of me, my mind. When I think about you, I don't know what I think. It's like a mesmerising feeling of awe. It's like inside my nerves thousands of dolphins go by, butterflies tickle, wind of storms passes through, the leaves fall from the strongest tree. You are the one I wanna avoid but at the same time I would love to be with".
■ It is amusing that I felt like that in reality. I never thought it would be true but unfortunately it is. My people would never approve of it- they simply don't understand it as an ancient race. There are many amusing yet depressing things in this world and one of them is one sided love. So how I feel? I will tell that too:
"Look into my eyes... and hokos pokos. .. hipnotising... Is it magic? Who knows.. you can call it anything. You were true that I avoide looking into people's eye.. cause I don't want them to see inside the hard shell or how week I'm inside. It's hard to live without a hard face in a cruel world. It has become a habit. So I don't make eye contact with you as well. I'm afraid of something or may be nothing. May be I fear that I may not be able to controll myself or won't be able to speak a word and you may notice how I feel. You would make fun of me or avoide me. You could think I'm one of those other crazy girls who has fallen for you and chasing you madly or I'm really one of them to you. Do you care if I'm there or not? A lots of question that I want answer of but have no intention to ask. Cause I can't afford losing you for a moment. I'm afraid, I'm afraid of the emotions regarding you, of you. I can't look into your eyes cause... because I love you".
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■ Have you ever asked what a girl who is madly in love without a heart wants? I can tell mine though I am not one. Chill, I am not a by!
"I don't know anymore what I want...Theres a confution created between what to want, what I should want, what I need. But who to gave and do I really want anything at all! I have everything, then what's this emptyness for?! I wish I had known! Father please show me way to get away from these shits.. seriously this time."
■ I know what are you thinking but I wish I could do this thought reading to him too. So, where I am from? What do I do? Who is the one I felt all these bull- shit for? What are all these troubles I am talking about! I will explain everything but I feel too emotional to write one more line. Will continue it later...
